What would you give up to stay home?
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| Sat, 08-05-2006 - 8:36am |
Hi everyone.
I have always said that staying home is so important to me that I would give up many things to be able to do that. We live in a very small home, I have no jewelry and we buy all our clothes at Walmart. I know that if I went back to work, we could afford more. But I would never trade being at home for a larger house or more luxuries.
However, after reading this board I have started to suspect that there are things I would not want to give up. If I couldn't send my kids to preschool a couple of hours a day, if I couldn't afford any after school activities like ballet lessons or if I could'nt afford any kind of summer program for them, I think I would have to find a way to go back to work. So basically, I'm perfectly happy to deny myself "things." But I would not want to take much away from the kids.
Of course I would probably have to find a new career becuase I could never work the 80 hours a week my old career entailed.

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Most of the post-docs I worked with at the university were paid cr*p....but they were all very smart
Some people do jobs they love and are passionate about (like medical research) NOT for the money
its not all about money for some
"Having a mom who has financial power has a powerful impact on girls from what I can see."
I'm sure this is true, but SAHM's wield a different type of power. As for a working mom, it's important to use and model that power very carefully. Paris Hilton has financial power; that doesn't make her a positive role model for women (IMO).
One of my best friends when I was working was the custodian who cleaned my classroom. She made very little money, but she was a beautiful person, and her DS's (both teenagers) and her husband were extremely proud of her. I'd rather have my family proud of me for my character than my income, even if I were as wealthy as myshkamouse with her "high 6 fig, low 7" per year earnings. :)
"Paris Hilton has financial power; that doesn't make her a positive role model for women (IMO)."
LOL!
agree!
(But I sure am jealous of myshkamouse's 7 figures, that must be SWEET! And if I made that much I would work five years, save most of it and then be a SAHM for the rest of my happy, well-invested life - but thats just me. LOL. All the power to u myshkamouse! if i were your daughter, I would be proud of u)
Edited 8/10/2006 12:00 am ET by noah2004
So, what happens if a man who can't balance work and family marries a woman who can't balance work and family. Which one of them has to suck it up and be an adult?"
Well gee, hopefully they've discussed this prior to marriage. I know most *adults* would.
Outside of that, your view on SAH WOH is so extreme its fairly laughable...even to me...and I'm a serious WOHM.
MM
agree
kbmammm - do u think there is anything positive about SAHMs (or rather, I should say SAHPs)?
Then there's my neighbor, a fellow SAHM like me. She's got 3 little ones; one in 1st grade, the next, 4, is autistic and goes to a specialized head-start-like program 3 days a week. And then their 3 year old.
She walked out on them about a week after school let out for the summer....just waited for her dh to get home from work, took the car and left. He didn't know where she was going; he certainly had no idea she'd just left them all. I've seen her back once; she seemed to be home for the day to watch the kids (who've been with her dh's Mom otherwise when he's at work). haven't seen her since.
She took off just about 3 days after they bought a 2nd car (a minivan). I guess her dh and the kids ought to be just grateful she left them the minivan.
Ah, an organ transplant. That's interesting. A friend of mine had a liver transplant and was permanently on anti-rejection drugs. He also had a ft job, a wife who worked ft and a child. They not only managed but got on quite well overall. I'm finding it very hard to imagine how just an organ transplant requires so much of her time that it wouldn't be possible to marry or have kids. Are there more health problems, perhaps?
"Their home has to be spotless and sanitized at all times. When you visit, you take your shoes off outside and wash up as soon as you're inside. I don't think a nursing home could provide the sterile environement she needs. I have no idea why it's so strict but I know little about organ transplants."
This made me laugh a bit. The only sterile environment I know is the inside of a laminar flow bench or the inside of a sterilized flask. It is not possible to come even remotely close to a "sterile environment" inside a home or anywhere else in the real world. Taking shoes off outside and washing up as soon as you are inside hardly sounds like work or stress. It's what my children are expected to do every day.
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