What would you give up to stay home?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2004
What would you give up to stay home?
1422
Sat, 08-05-2006 - 8:36am

Hi everyone.

I have always said that staying home is so important to me that I would give up many things to be able to do that. We live in a very small home, I have no jewelry and we buy all our clothes at Walmart. I know that if I went back to work, we could afford more. But I would never trade being at home for a larger house or more luxuries.

However, after reading this board I have started to suspect that there are things I would not want to give up. If I couldn't send my kids to preschool a couple of hours a day, if I couldn't afford any after school activities like ballet lessons or if I could'nt afford any kind of summer program for them, I think I would have to find a way to go back to work. So basically, I'm perfectly happy to deny myself "things." But I would not want to take much away from the kids.

Of course I would probably have to find a new career becuase I could never work the 80 hours a week my old career entailed.

Lilypie Baby Ticker

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2006
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 9:01am
Gee, when put that way it's all making sense to me!!!! LOL.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 9:09am

**What bugs me about the situation is her moms attitude echos others here. That she SAH with her kids so now they owe her.**

Can you back that statement up? Please show me where anyone has said that their kids will "owe" them one day because they SAH with them.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 9:11am
I agree. When we married, my MIL was really ill, In fact, we were afraid she wouldn't make it to our wedding.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 9:18am
I bet your family reunions are a blast.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 9:51am

Hey, so what if work defines, in part, who a person is?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 9:56am

I wouldn't make major life decisions, such as to SAH or WOH, based on something as variable and changeable as my childrens' happiness.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 9:58am
It can be a little different dynamic than what you're used to if you and your spouse are in the same profession.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2006
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 10:00am
I have no problem with having part of my identity defined by my career (which I'll return to in about 2 years) and my current SAH status. They are both part of who I am and the choices I have made. Like you said though, not all just a part. I'm not sure how soemones occupation (or lack thereof) doesn't in a least a small way define who they are... but I'm sure others disagree with thet.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 10:02am

"I now spend my time with them, which, in a child's world, is WAY more important than their mom going off to work."


Not necessarily.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 10:10am

True. But, but as I said in my post, I do believe many younger children prefer their mother.

**If that were true across the board, no mom would choose to WOH.**

Not necessarily. Some mothers, like kbmammm, have made it clear that their child's happiness does not figure into whether or not they WOH.

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