What would you give up to stay home?
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| Sat, 08-05-2006 - 8:36am |
Hi everyone.
I have always said that staying home is so important to me that I would give up many things to be able to do that. We live in a very small home, I have no jewelry and we buy all our clothes at Walmart. I know that if I went back to work, we could afford more. But I would never trade being at home for a larger house or more luxuries.
However, after reading this board I have started to suspect that there are things I would not want to give up. If I couldn't send my kids to preschool a couple of hours a day, if I couldn't afford any after school activities like ballet lessons or if I could'nt afford any kind of summer program for them, I think I would have to find a way to go back to work. So basically, I'm perfectly happy to deny myself "things." But I would not want to take much away from the kids.
Of course I would probably have to find a new career becuase I could never work the 80 hours a week my old career entailed.

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Oh, I am sure it doesnt come easy. You must work very hard.
I meant more the 7 figure income itself is pretty sweet. Not the work it takes to get it (that must not always be a piece of cake!).
>>we have very good friends who live in italy and they really dont understand why we dont let our kids have a glass of wine with dinner, especially once they hit the older years. my room mate in college was from france and she grew up drinking wine with dinner. another friend spent her high school years in singapore and drinking wine with a meal was totally accepted as normal.
Jennie<<
i was raised in a household with a very similar way of thinking. i was allowed to taste or drink wine (and sometimes beer, and of course age appropriate amounts. no getting smashed).
i believe taht age appropriate exposure to things like alcohol, sex and even drugs can help teach a child what is and isn't responsable behavour WRT these things. it takes the taboo out of it, and teaches them when and how they should be able to anjoy these things responsably.
basically, i'll be taking the european route with taboo subjects LOL.
turn that idea around for a moment.
what if, but continueing in your career regardless of children, you pass on to your children that you spend time with them only when it is convienient for you, and your employer?
people change jobs on a regular basis, particularly in this economic environment. many many people are also taking time off for re education, re training, or to go into business for themselves.
taking time off for family/child rearing should be no different.
IMO i think that parents who choose to take a few years off to tend to their children and then go back into teh work force are teaching their children that there are not only options out there beyond being a corperate slave, but that it is perfectly OK to think that there are some things out there that are more important than having near perfect attendance at your job, for little more than a tidy paycheck at the end of every week, and some sense of self worth. those "other things" could be going back to college, taking the risk of starting up their own career, starting a family, or simply following their dreams.
and by letting them know that its OK to do that, they will certainly develop a strong sense of self worth, esteem, and confidence.
i am still mainly a stay at home mother. i guess you coul dget technical and say i am a "part time WOHM, or part time SAHM"
but the fact remains that i spend the majority of my time in the home, with a focus on child care.
and believe me, with day care costs at $500 per week, and the average income of families in this area at about $30k per year, there has been a dramatic rise in staying at home, other care (family members, etc), or parents "splitting shifts" in this area.
our COL has now far surpassed our income amounts in the area. and it is a pity.
Wow! I stand corrected. I'll continue to read with and to my kids because I do still want to pass on the value of reading in itself.However, I cannot wrap my brain around how simply owning books, witout reading them, can improve a test score. Weird.
Thanks for the clarification on the study though. It makes a little more sense the way you explained it.
"I would think bookless homes would be pretty hard to find these days."
Not really, unless textbooks from schools rule out a home as "bookless." I visited quite a few homes of my inner city teenage students in Dallas. Here's a pretty typical scenario: when you walk in the door of the small home or apartment, you are greeted by a blaring, big screen TV. No bookshelves, books, magazines, or newspapers in sight. In fact, after I discovered that students didn't know where local libraries and bookstores were, I started including a question about this topic on my "getting to know you" questionnaire the first day of school, something like, "What books do you have access to at home?" or something just to feel out what kind of exposure students were getting at home. I'd usually have at least 10 students in each class of 30 who didn't have books at home other than their school books and perhaps a Bible or rosary text, and only 1-2 in a class of 30 had family subscriptions to newspapers.
I think our school also spent at least $50,000 per year replacing lost and vandalized textbooks--always wondered if the correlation was that students hadn't been taught the value of books at home??
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