What would YOU have to do to SAH?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
What would YOU have to do to SAH?
2476
Fri, 02-13-2009 - 5:09pm

If you're a WOH/WAH mom, what sort of "downsizing" would you need to do in order to afford to be a SAHM? (SAHM defined here as not earning any money)

For me, I would have to put all our non-essential possessions in storage and move in with my parents.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 12:33pm

Well, of course. How else was she to get the MRS degree?

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2008
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 1:11pm

LOL!


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2009
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 1:31pm

Your posts confuses me.

On the one hand you tout a man working 80 hours a week to support his family to be a good thing.

But you also state that your DH working many hours every week was the cause of the demise of your marriage. So how is it a good thing.

The dynamic of your marriage was set up when you both decided that him working 80 hours a week was the best thing for your family. It only became a problem when you wanted to change the dynamic and have him spend more time at home.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 1:44pm

"I think that's because a lot of the women on this board don't have the mindset that its desirable for children to have a father they barely see because he works 7 days a week.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2008
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 2:33pm

No kidding.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 2:46pm
i don't believe any of those points represent a general population of families with sahms.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 3:01pm

"OH---and to answer someone's question----as the mother of a newborn, I was the primary caretaker of my infant----nursing as well as everything else. Do I think my baby noticed if dad was or wasn't around much from birth until 4 months? No. But do I think the baby would have noticed the difference between being cared for and nursed by me at home versus being stuck in a daycare with a bunch of other babies being bottle fed and stuck in a swing and rarely held because the infant teachers had a bunch of other babies to "care for"?

YES!"

But that wasn't Dylan's experience in dc. In CA, the ratio is 2 infants (defined as a child up to his 2nd birthday) to one adult. Which is better than what I had as an infant with a sahm. And while bottles were offered to him, he didn't like them. It didn't matter what was in them. So he reversed nursed at home and we co-slept.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2008
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 3:07pm

You were lucky and your scenario is not the norm.


Most daycares centers

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2008
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 3:18pm


Know the Licensing Requirements in Your State

In California, infant centers have a 4 to 1 infant-to-teacher ratio. Before you walk into a daycare, you should know what the child-to-teacher ratios are in your state. Then, ask what the ratio is for the class that your child will potentially be in. As children get older, the ratios increase (6 to 1 for toddlers, 10 to 1 for Pre-K's, etc.) Make sure that any daycare you are considering knows these requirements and strictly adheres to them.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 3:35pm

And you know this from your vast experience with daycare centers?


my daughter was in a d/c center-- not home basedcare- a center.

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