What would YOU have to do to SAH?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
What would YOU have to do to SAH?
2476
Fri, 02-13-2009 - 5:09pm

If you're a WOH/WAH mom, what sort of "downsizing" would you need to do in order to afford to be a SAHM? (SAHM defined here as not earning any money)

For me, I would have to put all our non-essential possessions in storage and move in with my parents.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:31am

Yes, exactly.


PumpkinAngel

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:33am
No, I'm saying that all parents who can help their kids, should. That does mean that my kids get more out of the science fair than the disadvantaged child whose parent can't or won't help. I can live with that. We have open enrollment in our district, and we chose this school. We love it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:34am

Sometimes people see what they want to see, regardless of whether or not it's true.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:36am

<>


The kids doing them at home doesn't have to equate to "family project" that requires substantian input/involvement from the parents.

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:36am

So when you said the projects weren't fair because they put the low-income kids at a disadvantage, and that parent help vs not doing the project at all weren't the only options, you weren't suggesting that parents shouldn't be allowed to help? What exactly were you suggesting as the other option?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:36am

<>


I don[t know if this addresses me or not, but if it does....that's not what I'm saying either.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:43am

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that just because it isn't happening doesn't mean it can't. I am also speaking from the experience of having kids in a school with a very high number of low-income kids and kids with mother tongues other than Swedish. Their school doesn't even have the advantage of having teachers who speak all (or even many, for that matter) of the languages spoken by the students. However, the kids do seem to actually manage to get a reasonably decent education in the end. The school doesn't have much in the way of high-tech goodies; in fact, the whole place has a somewhat down-trodden look with only the most basic computers available in a few places and no extra-curricular activities offered. There isn't anywhere near a ratio of 1 teacher for 10 kids (it's more like 1 for 20-25 in the elementary grades, which is somewhat of an improvement over 1:30, but still not brilliant).

I think a number of factors play into the success of the school. One of the key factors is that even the poorest children have usually spent some years in preschool/daycare before starting school. Another key factor is that the entire emphasis from k-7 is on learning a set of basic concepts with absolutely no focus on grades (so, for example, whether a child learns how to spell quickly or is slower at it doesn't matter at all as long as, by 7th grade, that child learns how to spell). Yet another factor, in my opinion, is that schools consider it their job to ensure a child has learned the basics regardless of parental participation. They can't just ignore a kid who is failing, they are required to deal with that kid, even if it means the school has to hire a private tutor. Yes, that can get costly for the school, although it receives some extra funds for "challenging" children. It has had to be done on occasion, however, and the school has had to cut funds from other areas in order to cover the costs.

"especially when they run the gamut from gifted kids to kids who can barely speak English"

Well, and then there are the kids who are both gifted and can barely speak English, right ;-)?

"And I think I'm done talking about the science fair, but the science fair and other projects I'm talking about are not part of the basic curriculum."

I absolutely agree with you with regard to science fair projects. I don't consider that part of a basic curriculum. Some kids are going to have an advantage with such projects regardless of whether parents help or not. Mine would probably know exactly what to do without a lot of input from us simply because they've been bored out of their minds with science talk at the dinner table for years :-).

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:46am

<<all parents who can help their kids, should.>>


Why? Why should I help my child? My child doesn't need or want my help.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:50am

<>


And it creates a viscious cycle.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 02-26-2009 - 10:50am

I don't know.

PumpkinAngel

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