When did structure become a bad thing?
Find a Conversation
| Fri, 07-30-2004 - 8:19am |
We used to live next door to a "no structure" family. The kids ran wild in the neighborhood, the mom never planned dinner so lord only knows if and when the kids ate. Sorry, I don't think that's a good way to live. My kids know we eat dinner at 6:30, so they have to be home.
I can see taht you wouldn't demand that an infant go to bed and wake up at precisely the same time, but is there ever a time to impose structure on a child? So lets say you are the freewheeling type and have always doen things whenever. What happens when you send your child to school where the bell rings at the same time every day?
As far as activities, I realize all kids are different, but when my kids were little, if we just did whatever, whenever, my kids woudl end up grumpy and overtired. My experience is that if say, we were at the beach and I say, oh heck, let's just stay later, the kids woudl be happy at first, but by the days end I would end up with whiny, overtired kids.
Maybe I'm just misinterpreting what I am reading, but I personally think structure is a good thing. When children are small, the structure includes naptimes, mealtimes, etc. As they get older it evolves into boundaries like "be home at 6 for dinner" or "you can't go into soemones house without telling me first". I couldn't imagine living without structure or boundaries for my kids.
Susan

Pages
I've never heard you mention these types of programs before . . . only North Shore, CSI, shows that your DD enjoys, etc. - the "fluff" types of programs from which you get zero mental stimulation.
PumpkinAngel
Depends on our mood, what the show is about or featuring at that particular time.
The only thing we will not ever watch is anything sports related! Nothing on that line is ever on our tv.
Paige
But other things on tv, like some of the documentaries, discovery & history channel shows do provide mental stimulation if you like those kind of programs.
We watch a wide variety. Entertainment & as otherwise stated above & children programming all.
No, you are confusing or maybe I didn't make myself clear. When we sit down at 7 with our tv trays we are in front of the tv for the night (literally, since we usually leave it on to sleep with even, we didn't use to but we started it & really like it).
Other times, like right this minute, the tv is on but it provides nothing more than some entertainment value & that not fully since I'm only hearing bits & pieces of it. Dh & dd are outside playing ball & I'm getting ready to fix some supper.
Paige
"Habit. I just flip the remote on before I get my shoes off.
Sleeping with it on is habit.
Tv is great mental stimulation here. "
Hey, I don't watch CSI but I do get mental stimulation out of shows like it. I've learned a lot about the law and forensics by watching L&O and Crossing Jordan (and Quincy reruns! lol). It can be good mental stimulation to figure out whodunit.
I often prefer TV to reading (although I read a LOT) because I can watch L&O and get a good does of whodunit mystery stuff while I fold laundry or do dishes, etc. But I can't read a book while I fold laundry. I can't ead a book with my hands elbow deep in Dawn suds.
Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color. Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.
I don't know if this is true for paige, but here's how it is for me ...
I almost always have the tv on. I often am not "watching" it, but it provides a form of stimulation and motivation. For example, if I have 3 days of dishes to wash, and the house is silent (no tv), my mind wanders while I'm washing. I mean, c'mon, how mentally stimulating is dishwashing? I'll be thinking about this board and go post instead of finishing the dishes. i'll think of dbf and go call him instead of doing the dishes. I'll think of work and lose motivation, etc, etc, etc. But if I have the tv on for background, my mind pays partial attention to it and keeps itself occupied. And the dishes get done. having the background noise/stiumulation keeps me from getting bored of mundane tasks like laundry and i actually, gasp, get them done.
music sometimes works for me and I'll do that too instead of the tv. But its much easier to hit the ON button and change to channel 44 (tlc, lol) than it is to pick out a cd, put it in, turn all the components on, hit play, etc. (which is why i love my digital music now ... as easy as turning the tv channel to get music. my tv is off a lot more since i got digital music channels)
My personality makes it so i NEED to multi-task to be efficient and effective. and its hard to multi-task doing dishes or laundry or paying bills. TV lets me do that.
Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color. Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.
YUM! Oh, and with a cold pint;-0
Mondo
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-pssahwoh&msg=13988.1290
Habit. I just flip the remote on before I get my shoes off.
Sleeping with it on is habit.
Tv is great mental stimulation here.
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-pssahwoh&msg=13988.1248
I did NOT mean it like YOU read it.
Sorry for confusion. Paige
Pages