Which came first, the title or the SAHW?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Which came first, the title or the SAHW?
1695
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 9:04am
Last night I attended my husband's work Christmas party. I sat with the CEO, CFO, CTO, COO (Chief operations officer, I didn't know that acronym, I had to ask), Creative Director, Marketing Director and their wives. Near the end of the evening it was just we wives chatting mostly about kids. I made the observation that even though all the wives were intelligent, educated and accomplished women, not a single one (except me), woh. They are all SAHM's.

Any thoughts on why that might be? I have my own opinion but I'd like to hear from everyone else first. Do you think they sah because of their husbands jobs or their husbands have their jobs because the wives stay home? Or doesn't it matter?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 5:53pm
I can grasp your point, and like I indicated, I don't disagree that it probably is EASIER for SAHMs to do these things than it is for dual WOHP families. But just b/c it isn't as EASY doesn't mean it isn't, or can't be, done.

For example, it's not EASY for a dual WOHP family to take their children to the park/museum/beach every day. (do SAHMs *really* do this daily??? . . . ) But they DO do it, just on a different schedule than SAHMs. And it's not EASY for a dual WOHP family to have gourmet meals nightly (again, do SAHMS really do this?) but they CAN do it if they choose. Just takes a little scheduling.

No, little fairies don't come and do all this stuff for WOHPs. They do it themselves. And many have no problem with fitting it into their schedule.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 6:31pm
How? What is the benefit of SAH that offsets the benefit of mom WOH (when it is a benefit)?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 7:49pm
Saying that her income would not make a difference and saying she isnt *capable of earning enough money to make a difference* are 2 entirely different things.


dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 7:51pm
Being at home would mean your child would not be coming home to an empty house. THAT is what was being discussed here. Not being home while your child was elsewhere.


dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 7:52pm
Nope. Nowhere in this thread have I offered MY definition of what it is for WOH to benefit a family. What I've questioned is why wouldn't mom WOH IF WOH were of benefit to her family. Never have I defined the benefit. It varies.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 7:56pm
again, i'll have to respectfully disagree. i have a housecleaning fairy...a nanny who is the "light" housekeeping fairy and the grocery fairy (ordered online and delivered to the house).

<>

LOL! No insult to your common sense, but there ARE weekends (as you allege), holidays AND vacations. and yes, during those days, we can spend HOURS there -- why do you think we wouldn't? However, i sah the equivalent of 184+ DAYS per year -- plenty of time to do the beach, museum or park or movie or arcade or bowling, etc.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 7:59pm
Who says they'd be coming home to an empty house if I WOH? Regardless, they can just go elsewhere, like the girl across the street whose mom SAH used to do, lol. Physical presence doesn't count for much unless you do something with it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 8:10pm
Cyndi, no one SAID that mere physical presence is the key here. You keep harping on that but no one said it. The ONLY thing that has been said is that having a child come home to an empty house is not a good idea. And sure, that can be avoided in a myriad of ways. But if I am home, then my dd will be coming home too. Why would I be home and just allow her to go elsewhere after school without supervision or knowing what she is doing? You are making a point that just doesnt exist here, and being really ridiculous about it.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 8:12pm
Um, no. Either the income mom is capable of generating makes a difference or it doesn't.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Tue, 12-30-2003 - 8:12pm
Then quit arguing with me on it.

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