Which came first, the title or the SAHW?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Which came first, the title or the SAHW?
1695
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 9:04am
Last night I attended my husband's work Christmas party. I sat with the CEO, CFO, CTO, COO (Chief operations officer, I didn't know that acronym, I had to ask), Creative Director, Marketing Director and their wives. Near the end of the evening it was just we wives chatting mostly about kids. I made the observation that even though all the wives were intelligent, educated and accomplished women, not a single one (except me), woh. They are all SAHM's.

Any thoughts on why that might be? I have my own opinion but I'd like to hear from everyone else first. Do you think they sah because of their husbands jobs or their husbands have their jobs because the wives stay home? Or doesn't it matter?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:18pm
""Downtime "can be had at the beach or a nature preserve,can't it?"

I would have to say that that would depend an awful lot on the kid...mine have always loved going to the beach or nature preserve, but they would hardly call it "downtime", more like pretty active busy time since doing either one would involve some trekking, a lot of walking and, chances are, fighting the elements. True "downtime" for them means really just hanging out, either in the garden or in the house and having a choice of activities at home. My kids have always needed a fair amount of that. Even when I was at home ft, we usually stuck to 2 playgroups per week and either 1-2 playdates or 1-2 outings or some combination of the two. The weeks I would have them booked up with activities every day would result in highly cranky kids by the end of the week. Also, it might be good to keep in mind that a relaxing day at the beach or nature preserve is highly dependent on weather....we have very few days per year that could be described, weather-wise, as relaxing. Most days either threaten rain, or have a lot of rain or are just plain cold. We still go out in those conditions, but it does wear us all down after awhile.


Laura

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:22pm
Big deal, I never go to the grocery store on weekends, either. So what? You act like shopping midweek is a privilege reserved for SAHMs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:29pm
We will? Who told you THAT?

We'll have enough to retire but 5 million? I wish!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:31pm
I didn't HAVE to quit work altogether I wanted to. See the dif?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:37pm
I don't know who you are, or what your problem is, but you can save your boring diatribes. You're happy with your life. Good. I'm thrilled for you.

And I don't have to fantasize about anything, my mom woh fulltime her whole life and hated it. She had to. She wanted her daughters not to have to work as hard as she did, and I can't tell you how happy she was that at least one of us was able to sah. As soon as my BIL moves up in his career my sister is planning on quitting her job. We saw first hand that woh with kids isn't the idyllic picture you paint but whatever, it's your life, your choices and you're happy with them, as am I.

Isn't that the way it should be?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:40pm
Absolutely!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:44pm
Very true. I was talking about younger kids. I'm the first to admit that I don't agree with moms staying home when the kids are in school. I don't really see a point in it.

Our beach has a very cool skatepark, so now I take the boys and a friend each, drop them at the skatepark while I run, read or just sit on the beach. No, they wouldn't go to the beach with their mom, how uncool would THAT be?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 2:47pm
That's true. I never wanted a nanny. I would've been too jealous of her being at the beach with my kids while I was behind a desk. NO WAY!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 3:02pm
Very uncool. I went through that when dd was in MS. Being seen with mom was up there with chinese water torture. I have to say that now that she is is HS, she is actually warming back up to family type stuff. She actually went to the movies with us last weekend and then out to dinner. Tonight she and her boyfriend are spending NYE with us. She and I even did our Christmas shopping together. If I had suggested a year ago that we go to the mall together, she would have balked. I's kind of nice to have my dd back after three years of eye rolling and embarassment of being seen together by someone.

Susan

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-31-2003 - 3:11pm
Give me abreak.We like the outdoors!Can't someone freaking enjoy being outdoors w/out the Tight Vagina Long-Nosed prigs being critical?No offense.,of course...

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