Which came first, the title or the SAHW?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Which came first, the title or the SAHW?
1695
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 9:04am
Last night I attended my husband's work Christmas party. I sat with the CEO, CFO, CTO, COO (Chief operations officer, I didn't know that acronym, I had to ask), Creative Director, Marketing Director and their wives. Near the end of the evening it was just we wives chatting mostly about kids. I made the observation that even though all the wives were intelligent, educated and accomplished women, not a single one (except me), woh. They are all SAHM's.

Any thoughts on why that might be? I have my own opinion but I'd like to hear from everyone else first. Do you think they sah because of their husbands jobs or their husbands have their jobs because the wives stay home? Or doesn't it matter?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 12:08pm
actually, it's only 181 days....and while i may not work as long during the year, i do find that i put in a full day -- both before the day has begun and after it is officially over.

do i work as hard as some? No. do i work as hard or harder than others? Yup.

eileen

Avatar for laurenmom2boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 12:24pm
It blew me away too because I couldn't figure out where it had come from. If anything you are so middle-of-the-road in this debate. And I've never considered you a "tight-a$$." LOL!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 12:57pm
So that makes teaching a PT job? Just because other professions work more hours? I thought Full time was defined by the employer, not you Slim. My dh works 60 hours a week. I work 40. My job is not PT, it's FT. As far as teachers, if school hours are 8-2, the teachers at my kids schools get there before 7:30, some earlier. Most leave around 2:30 or so. That 35 hours a week, min, FT work. I live across the street from a middle school. I see teachers cars pulling in the lot around 8. School starts at 9 and ends at 4. The parking lot doesn't empty out til 4:30 at the earliest, plus in our district, every secondary school teacher MUST take on an extracurricular activity. Some do tutoring, some coach sports, some are the faculty advisors of clubs. At our HS, school is out at 3:00. Teachers are REQUIRED to stay until 4:00, to provide extra instruction.

Susan

Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 1:13pm
Full time means @40 hours work a week. So, how can you work full time, and not generally work most, if not all day? >>

Not at my job, it doesn't. At my job, full time is 37.5 hours a day and THEY occur from 11pm to 7am."

Like I said @ (which means about) 40 hours. You work 37.5, thats @40! Drrr!


9 Which leaves PLENTY of time to visit museums, parks and the library."

Even with 12.5 hours of commuting and 37.5 working? You are amazing -- and must not sleep much!

" And I know for a fact, I'm not the only person in the US with fewer than 40 hours counting full time, whoork nights.."


Who said you were?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 1:26pm
But your commute (and H and I's for that matter) are pretty extreme. There are lots of ways that one can work essentially full time and still have time in the afternoons, and I don't think I am so unusual in that way. If one has a short commute (lots do, our longest commute is 15 minutes), if one juggles the schedules so that one person starts early and the other later (that is what we do), if the time gets split in other ways (I often have to work a couple of hours on the weekends and can take off a little earlier during the week, dh has the same flexibility). The point is....it is perfectly possible to combine ft WOH with afternoon excursions and activities. No, not everyone can do this, but it is not some incredibly miniscule number of people who have that kind of flexibility either.


Laura

Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 1:59pm
Oh look I agree! If I had a 15 min. commute I could certainly imagine more time (1.5-2 hours more!) a day to do things with the twins. I just thought it amazing that this poster works 37.5 hours, and, commutes 12.5 (50 hours a week???!!) and still has all this time to do things. But all the power to her. Personally, I couldnt imagine how I'd do it! But...I also have twins which makes doing anything a little more "interesting" to say the least....



MM

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 2:16pm
Now that I could easily imagine! I have twin nephews and a couple of my friends have twins. Getting out, especially when they are little, is a MUCH bigger challenge than I ever had, even with two. But it does get better, I promise :-).

I LOVE our commute and, in fact, we probably went a little higher in price with our house than we should have (not much, but definitely a bit) because we wanted to make sure that our commute was kept to a minimum. Otoh, I figure that with the cost of gas around here (over $4 a gallon) we probabably actually saved a lot just by lowering our gas comsuption.

Laura

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 2:59pm
THANK YOU. My FT hours are set by my employer. Our "work" day is 8-2:30...however, it is expected that we will make accomodations for before and/or after school extra help/teacher detentions. Therefore, i'm usually one of the first 10 people in the building between 6:30 and 6:45 (in fact, i'm often talking to my sister on our cell phones as we're each on the way to work). even though the work day is over, it seems that i rarely leave before 3:10 or 3:20 -- calling parents, grading papers, checking e-mail, tutoring, etc...

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 3:05pm
No, "@" doesn't mean approximately, it means "at". "~" means approximately. (Drrr.)

I commute an hour and 15 minutes to work, and an hour and 15 minutes home. that, plus my 8 hour day (minus 30 minutes unpaid for lunch) leaves 13.5 hours every single day of non-working/commute time. I sleep about 8.5 hours a day, leaving 5 hours a day, or 25 hours during the week. In 25 hours, I can generally find the time to visit the park 3 times a week (1 hour/day to walk the 4 mile perimeter of the lake), and a 30-45 minute trip to the library once a week and more than enough time to take a 4 hour block of time to visit a museum and still make sure I get all the housework chores completed. the library and park are close to my home and the museums surround my office (one of the advantages of working shift work one block from the White House).

It's hardly anything that difficult.

do I visit the museums every single week? No, but I never claimed to. I simply said there's plenty of time to do so, and do it on a weekday while still working full time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-01-2004 - 3:10pm
My commute would only be 45 minutes if I drove all the way in. But I drive 20 minutes to the Metro system and take the subway the rest of the way to work. It adds 30 minutes each way, but it adds 30 minutes of productive time for me because it gives me time to read, to do cross-stitch; last year it was where I did the bulk of my studying for my Bible study course--virtually a full hour's time every single day to get my Scripture readings in, which was nice.

It's also more environmentally friendly to take the subway, so I try to be part of the public that keeps the system viable. And it keeps the city rats from munching on the wiring in my car; one of my co-workers had to have his entire wiring harness replaced on his car because the rats had chewed through so many of the systems.

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