Which came first, the title or the SAHW?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Which came first, the title or the SAHW?
1695
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 9:04am
Last night I attended my husband's work Christmas party. I sat with the CEO, CFO, CTO, COO (Chief operations officer, I didn't know that acronym, I had to ask), Creative Director, Marketing Director and their wives. Near the end of the evening it was just we wives chatting mostly about kids. I made the observation that even though all the wives were intelligent, educated and accomplished women, not a single one (except me), woh. They are all SAHM's.

Any thoughts on why that might be? I have my own opinion but I'd like to hear from everyone else first. Do you think they sah because of their husbands jobs or their husbands have their jobs because the wives stay home? Or doesn't it matter?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 9:52am
Really??? I'm sorry you feel guilt over not seeing your children. I don't so I guess you're talking about yourself. You see, I see my children more than enough as it is. Always have.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 9:55am
Um, MOST of us increase our income. That's why MOST of us WOH. I'll settle for the majority here. If time is an issue, yes, more time can be a benefit. Fortunately, time is not an issue for most of us and even when it is, it seldom requires mom to opt out to find more time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 9:57am
I agree, provided you have enough income. The best money habits won't get you there if you don't have the income in the first place. However, you are correct, you can have income and bad money habits and still be in trouble. But it is easier to take care of things if you have enough to begin with.
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 10:16am

Yes, I believe I've already pointed that out in this thread.


However, it was quite clear in 144's post what she meant by "better". You acknowledged that meaning by referring to her examples as "exceptions to the rule".




Edited 12/28/2003 10:19:00 AM ET by taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 11:10am
As I said, increased income is not necessarily a benefit. Depends on the family. An increased income is a benefit for YOUR family, because without your income you'd drop to lower lower middle class. But that isnt the case for every person out there.

Is retiring considered opting out in your mind? Because thats what I did.

dj


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 11:10am
Brilliant comeback. Is too much holiday sugar slowing you down?

You can do better than that. Well, maybe not. If you knew anything about me (which clearly you don't), you would know that I sah with my children until they went to school, and I now teach in their school, so you see, I don't think it's possible for me to have any guilt over not seeing my children. It might be unnatural to see them any more than I already do. Oh, and I was an SE for IBM before I had children, which was a gig I didn't mind giving up in the least.

At any rate, I believe you when you say you don't feel any guilt over time spent (or not) with your children. What is enough, btw? 2 hours a day? 3? 4? Just curious. I don't believe that's the problem you so obviously have with SAHM's. It's jealousy, plain and simple. That emotion comes across loud and clear.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 11:12am
Why do you keep putting words in my mouth? Please show me where I said it was a guarantee? All I said is it CAN BE a good deterrent. Of course there have to be other factors involved.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 11:14am
And that is why one has to consider the individual before one can say that woh or sah is *better*. Your insistance that woh is better because of increased income only means its better FOR YOU.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 11:57am
Bringing up studies is one thing, Eileen, but we all know Cyndi does much more than that. She does seem to have a deep dislike of the thought that having a sahp could EVER be better for a family. She has often made disparaging remarks about sahps, and I long ago chalked it up to sour grapes. A lot of bitterness spills out of her posts. If she were truly happy with her choices, I dont think she would be so militant.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 12:00pm
Care to point out that post???

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