Which came first, the title or the SAHW?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Which came first, the title or the SAHW?
1695
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 9:04am
Last night I attended my husband's work Christmas party. I sat with the CEO, CFO, CTO, COO (Chief operations officer, I didn't know that acronym, I had to ask), Creative Director, Marketing Director and their wives. Near the end of the evening it was just we wives chatting mostly about kids. I made the observation that even though all the wives were intelligent, educated and accomplished women, not a single one (except me), woh. They are all SAHM's.

Any thoughts on why that might be? I have my own opinion but I'd like to hear from everyone else first. Do you think they sah because of their husbands jobs or their husbands have their jobs because the wives stay home? Or doesn't it matter?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 12:00pm
LOL, it doesn't hurt.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 12:29pm
But it still does not make it an inherent benefit.

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 1:47pm
And increased income is bad for who??? NO, I think it's pretty standard for increased income to be of benefit. I don't think all the WM's out there would be working for it if it were a bad thing, lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 1:49pm
Um, I've already said that some moms are not in position to benefit their family's via working. I'd think they're probably not working.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 1:56pm
Never said you did. Just laughing because you think it makes a difference. It didn't where I grew up, lol. What worked was keeping kids too damned busy to want to find trouble. It's funny how things worked out where I grew up. My mom, and the other WM's made sure we had someplace to be/something to do all the time to cover the time when they weren't working. My friends whose moms SAH ended up knocked up in much higher numbers. Mom home baking cookies while her dd is screwing her boyfriend behind the school accomplished nothing. Never having half an hour to yourself accomplished a lot. On the rare occaision I actually had unaccounted for time, all I wanted to do was veg out in my room and listen to my stereo. I didn't have time for boys. Mom made sure of that. Of course, I hated her for it, lol. If she were alive, I'd thank her for it today.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 1:57pm
You may not like it but higher SES is better and the current class of WM's is positively affecting their family's finances. I hardly think that the majority of the WM's out there are working because the higher income is bad for their families, lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 2:18pm
Never said it was bad. I said it was not necessarily a benefit. Sometimes more money is just more money, of no real benefit to anyone. It can be *nice* but it isnt a benefit.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 2:23pm
LOL, well if you think that just keeping a child busy is enough either, then the laugh is on you. Why would you assume I meant that the parent simply being home while the child was elsewhere was contigent to the child not getting into trouble? I was speaking SPECIFICALLY of a child coming HOME to an empty house. No, a mom or dad being home while the teen is out somewhere screwing someone isnt going to make a difference. But in that case, the mom being at work while the teen is supposed to be at volleyball practice but is really out screwing someone isnt going to make a difference either. Thats just a ridiculous analogy for you to make. And didnt you get married at 19 or something? Personally I think that is just as bad as getting pg-I'd be just as upset if my child chose to marry at that age, so keeping you busy caring for your younger siblings wasnt necessarily the answer, was it.

If my dd comes home to an empty house for 3 hrs, theres a higher chance of her having the time to get into trouble than her coming home to myself or dh being there WITH her. How on earth can you say that it DOESNT make a difference?????


dj


Edited 12/28/2003 2:28:00 PM ET by djknappsak

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 2:24pm
Again, I never said it WAS bad. I said it was not an inherent benefit. Just like you say sah isnt *bad* but there is no inherent benefit.


dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 12-28-2003 - 2:26pm
No, it wasnt a recent post. But I do seem to recall you saying you were considering allowing your oldest to be latchkey for a couple hours a day. Maybe I confused you with someone else and you plan to keep her in dc till she is 18?

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

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