Which came first, the title or the SAHW?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Which came first, the title or the SAHW?
1695
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 9:04am
Last night I attended my husband's work Christmas party. I sat with the CEO, CFO, CTO, COO (Chief operations officer, I didn't know that acronym, I had to ask), Creative Director, Marketing Director and their wives. Near the end of the evening it was just we wives chatting mostly about kids. I made the observation that even though all the wives were intelligent, educated and accomplished women, not a single one (except me), woh. They are all SAHM's.

Any thoughts on why that might be? I have my own opinion but I'd like to hear from everyone else first. Do you think they sah because of their husbands jobs or their husbands have their jobs because the wives stay home? Or doesn't it matter?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:01pm
I am saying if you compare the current class of WM's to the current class of SAHM's it can be said that the WM's are benefitting their families. Most WM's ARE bringing financial benefit to their families. Fill in the blank Most SAHM's ARE benefitting their family's by ______________________. There is no such statement for SAHM's.
Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:02pm
You discount the health benefit of less stress as doing nothing for kids NOW. Yet one of your benefits for working is future financial security, which ALSO does nothing for kids now.

I believe both are important benefits -- being healthy NOW and LATER for your kids and also being financially secure NOW and LATER for your kids. As long as we all have both, work status doesn't matter.

It just boggles my mind that you cannot, for even a fraction of a second, agree that less stress is a benefit to kids and that, for some, SAH instead of working provides less stress.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:02pm
LOL, Um then mom isn't capable of earning enough to better her children's lives, lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:09pm
Oh good grief! You really can't grasp this point can you? It wouldn't have mattered one scrap for my family if I could have quadrupled our family income by working at the time I ended up SAH, it still was better for me to be willing to SAH because there were other more pressing reasons for making that choice. I honestly can't believe we are the ONLY family in the world to come to the realisation that there were more important issues than money that dictated our choices in this matter.

Laura


Edited 12/29/2003 2:10:40 PM ET by laura_w2

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:11pm
But if there is already enough money, how would having dual wohps better their childrens lives? If both parents have basically the same earning potential, and choose to have one parent sah, how would MORE money be a benefit?

And how does that make mom not *capable* of earning *enough*? As I said, I know plenty of women who have the capability to earn very high incomes, but choose not to for various reasons.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:13pm
Then you need to define wealthy. Depends on where you live. Depends on your lifestyle. Depends on the INDIVIDUAL family and their situation.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:17pm
There is no such statement for wohms either. They may bring in more money for their families, but more money is NOT an inherent benefit. It depends on the family.

*Most wohms are bringing in more money for their family*. Yes, you can say that. You cannot say that its positive or negative or a benefit-until you look at the individual family.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:18pm
Again, no one ELSE said *just being home* was enough either.....

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:25pm
Did I say it would be?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
Mon, 12-29-2003 - 2:27pm
Um am I not allowed to see benefits to anyone but my kids in my working??? I don't just work to benefit them now. I do it for other reasons to. The discussion at hand is about what benefits them now. Got it?

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