Who has influenced your sah/woh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Who has influenced your sah/woh
2912
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:39pm

opinion to DIFFER. What I mean is--is there anyone on this board or in real life whose opinion/reasoning/debating/facts started to make your thinking more to the middle? As in if you thought sah or woh was best & then after some discussion/thought, you began to think that whatever is best for each family--really there is no one best way, etc.

We just really needed a new thread here!!!!!!!!

VickiSiggy.jpg picture by mamalahk

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:38am

"i just want my kids to know that they are never going to be deemed immoral or bad if they choose to have sex as teens."

Ditto :)

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:39am
My dh thinks that would be fun, too, but I think he'd last about a week without his computer stuff. He's actually a homebody, so I think he hasn't really thought that one through. And I love camping, but I like to get away from everything, which is too hard to do in an rv where you're tied to hookups, etc. Maybe I'll feel differently when I'm in my 60s...
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2004
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:39am

Same here. My kids had Halloween candy in their rooms every year until we threw it away at Christmas time.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:39am

We have something similar in our district.

PumpkinAngel

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:43am
Ah, maybe that's why you don't like it now. ;)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:45am

"No. I chose 21 because that's when I think you are truly an adult (rather than 18)."

Why? Is there something special about the age of 21?

Also, did you wait until 21 then? Or perhaps sometime later?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:46am
that i would be disappointed in them would be where you and i would part ways. i will not tell my dd that if she has sex i will be disappointed in her. i have told her that i dont think it is a good choice, and have told her why i think it is not a good choice but i really cant imagine sitting her down and saying if you do this i will be disappointed in you. that is not to say i would be happy about it. i just hope i have instilled in her enough influence, knowledge and self-worth to believe that she will put thought into the decision and enough confidence in me that she will come to me for guidance. i know with my daughter, when she feels something she has done will disappoint me she has a much more difficult time sharing that information.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:49am

"If sex at age 15 enhanced your life and in no way detracted, I'd say you were clearly the exception rather than the rule"

Perhaps so, perhaps not. Who's to say one way or the other?

"and that your experience says nothing about what we should teach our children about sex."

I wasn't aware that it should. Were you under such an impression?

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:54am

I think sex at 15 is a poor choice that can lead to negative consequences. I'm glad you didn't suffer those consequences, but I don't want my kids to risk it.

The teen brain is not fully developed at 15, which is why they are so emotional. Kids really aren't adults at that age, regardless of how mature you feel you were.

I don't think anybody is ready to have sex at 15. And personally, I'm glad I gave myself some time to explore relationships and dating without the added pressure/emotions of sex. There is absolutely no harm in waiting to have sex, but there can be a lot of harm in having it at 15. There is no sexual experience you can have at 15 that you can't have later.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:54am

"Are you really and truly OK with the thought that your dd might start having regular sexual intercourse at age 15?"

Yes, I am really and truly OK with the thought that my dd might start having regular sexual intercourse at age 15.

I am under no illusions whatsoever that this is indeed a distinct possibility.

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