Who has influenced your sah/woh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Who has influenced your sah/woh
2912
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:39pm

opinion to DIFFER. What I mean is--is there anyone on this board or in real life whose opinion/reasoning/debating/facts started to make your thinking more to the middle? As in if you thought sah or woh was best & then after some discussion/thought, you began to think that whatever is best for each family--really there is no one best way, etc.

We just really needed a new thread here!!!!!!!!

VickiSiggy.jpg picture by mamalahk

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:43pm

"I can't imagine a 15 year old who's having sex is limiting him or herself to once a week. When I started having sex, I wanted it every day."

Thanks for sharing LOL!

And your point is...?

BTW, seeing as you feel so comfortable sharing, perhaps you could enlighten us as to:

*When* the "When you started having sex, you wanted it every day" occured?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:44pm
thank you robin...ita. it's not that i dismiss the facts from such conversation, it's all about knowing where dh and i stand on such subject matter more......ot but just last night, the kids were getting ready for bed and i asked them if they had brushed their teeth. dd1 said she did then dd2 said no, she didn't. i looked at dd1 in the eye and asked if she did. she told me she really had not. i told her honesty is most important in this house. i informed her that i may not always like the answers but that being truthful and honest matter more than what i agree or don't agree with. yea yea, she said. lol.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:45pm

i wold agree that influence and impression matter more than textbook knowledge, but unlike you i am not going to dismiss or allow others to take even the textbook portion of my parenting responsibilities on this subject out of my hands. after attending this wonderful church event on teen sex did your daughter really not have questions for you? my daughter has had numerous years of sex education and each year she has had questions and we have had wonderful in depth discussions.

i think the part you are not getting is that i am each and every one of the things with my daughter that you are discussing with yours, but for us that discussion also includes her understanding that she is ultimately responsible for her choices. please explain the difference between a choice and a decision?

i do not think teen sex is a rite of passage and that you would even think that after everything you have supposedly read that i have written just tells me you are readindg what you want to hear and not what is written. is teen sex always about peer pressure - i dont believe that at all. i would agree that for some it is but i also think that for some it is a much different thing. i wonder why you think every teen would be doing anyting for the same reason - do you really not give them credit for being able to think and reason on their own
Jennie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:46pm

I dont think its just a peer pressure thing. What if your child has a serious bf or gf and feels that they are truly in love?

There is a lot more going on in the teen world than *just* peer pressure.

And why cant textbook knowledge go hand in hand with sharing your viewpoints on sex? Dont you think your kids will feel better knowing that you actually HAVE the answers to questions they ask? Or are you just going to tell them to go ask their teacher or priest?

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:46pm
what's so special about 15?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:47pm
Are you sorry you didn't begin engaging in sexual intercourse at age 13?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:48pm

"I totally disagree. A person who is promiscuous is less moral than someone who is more chaste."

Could you please cite where promiscuity was discussed in post 1996?

BTW, here's the post :)

" i just dont see having or not having sex as some huge moral value."

Nor do I :)

"if my daughter were to have sex at 15 she would not be less moral in my opinion nor would she be more moral if she waited until she was 25"

Yep :)"

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:48pm

Well call me boring and old fashioned, but I wouldn't be "okay" with my 15 year old - daughter or son - having regular sex at age 15. It may be a distinct possibility, but that doesn't mean that I have to approve.

I wouldn't be okay with my 15 year old getting a tattoo, either. It is the tattoo I'm against - it is the potentially life changing decision that I feel might be prudent to wait to make.

Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:49pm

What, I don't seem like the camping type?


Camping I once heard defined as staying at any hotel that doesn't have at least three stars.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 12:50pm
so if your daughter comes to you one day and says you know mom my boyfriend and i are having sex, are you going to tell her thank you honey for being honest because that is more important than us agreeing? and do you think your daughter will believe she can come and tell you that? because that is not what i have gotten from your posts.
Jennie

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