Who has influenced your sah/woh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Who has influenced your sah/woh
2912
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:39pm

opinion to DIFFER. What I mean is--is there anyone on this board or in real life whose opinion/reasoning/debating/facts started to make your thinking more to the middle? As in if you thought sah or woh was best & then after some discussion/thought, you began to think that whatever is best for each family--really there is no one best way, etc.

We just really needed a new thread here!!!!!!!!

VickiSiggy.jpg picture by mamalahk

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 12:26pm
fortunately we are all allowed to parent in the way we feel best meets the needs of our own children. i dont know if my way is right, i dont know if your way is right, heck i dont know for sure that 3blessed way isnt right, all i know is i have to do what i feel will give my kids the best chance of making it to adulthood healthy and happy.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 12:32pm

"A moral philosophy or set of beliefs, a basic moral outlook, is by definition deeply felt as a part of who we are. Our children are also very dear to us and part of who we are. Our personal views on life and the nature of the universe are an important part of what we offer to our kids. That has been the basis of cultural transmission through the ages. You follow so far, right?:

Yes, and I wholeheartedly agree.

"So, we'd be doing ourselves and our children a disservice to withhold from them such an important part of ourselves, both in terms of the fullness of our relationships and also in terms of the duty we owe them to help them make some sense of the world."

Yes, again I wholeheartedly agree.

However, there seems to be some confusion wrt to the difference between *sharing* and *discussing* those important parts of ourselves with others vs. *imposing* those important parts of ourselves on others.

Do you see the difference between *sharing* and *discussing* our belief systems with others vs. *imposing* our belief system on others? Or do you think sharing, discussing, and imposing are basically all the same?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 12:33pm
i have kind of an off topic question, but it was raised in a post earlier in this thread somewhere. 3blessed said she did believe it was her job as the parent to provide her children with objective information, i totally disagree with this and was wondering how others thought.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 12:45pm
i would like to think those would not be the reasons my daughter would be giving to have sex. not saying that i would agree with any reason she would give, but those seem kind of stupid reasons to me. my daughter has had the same boyfriend for over a year and i am concerned that at some point in the future they will decide to become sexually active(granted i hope not), but i dont think it would be for those reasons.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 12:53pm

"I think parents have the ability to be much more objective than the teen in question"

How so?

For example:

Parent: My subjective/personal opinions = objective fact/truth/reality.

Teen: My subjective/personal opinions = objective fact/truth/reality.

Seems as if parents and teens alike are relying on the same "my way or the highway" mentality.

Would you agree or disagree?

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 12:53pm
And what?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 1:11pm

"Facts have to be supported...proven...by, you know, objective analysis and data."

Yes, I agree objective facts DO have to be supported by objective analysis and data.

"Otherwise, it's only objective opinion."

Perhaps you meant to say, "Otherwise it's only *subjective* opinion?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 1:21pm

"Facts have to be supported...proven...by, you know, objective analysis and data."

Your statements seem a bit contradictory. Could you please clarify?

From post 2475:

You: "I don't think any of my opinions are objective fact.

Me: Not *ANY*? There you go again.

Btw, if this is the case, would you please mind explaining the following statement?

From post 2401:

You: Yes, I believe biblical teachings as the "one and only one right, objective, correct, morally superior way."

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 1:27pm

<>

She knows that it is important to wait until marriage VS.

She knows that IMHO, it is important to wait until marriage?>>

"Yes, I do see the difference."

Thank you for the acknowledgement.

"Ultimately, the decision rest with her, and I respect that it is her choice, not mine or her fathers to make. "

Sounds like a reasonable as well as respectful stance.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 1:29pm

just wanted to clarify what i said jlk.....

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-pssahwoh/?msg=16582.2411

..i do *not* believe i can be a provider of objective information/advice to my child.

back to lurking :)

 

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