Who has influenced your sah/woh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Who has influenced your sah/woh
2912
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:39pm

opinion to DIFFER. What I mean is--is there anyone on this board or in real life whose opinion/reasoning/debating/facts started to make your thinking more to the middle? As in if you thought sah or woh was best & then after some discussion/thought, you began to think that whatever is best for each family--really there is no one best way, etc.

We just really needed a new thread here!!!!!!!!

VickiSiggy.jpg picture by mamalahk

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:05am
I didn't say that so I won't give you an example. However when I said that better and worse aren't always bad I can give you an example. It is better for me to SAH BUT if I had to WOH my children would have to be with a nanny. While to me WOH is worse than my SAH it isnt bad.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:06am
When I was a SAHM, looking to rtw, the other SAHMs told me the horror stories about the Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe. But when I looked at dc's, she was nowhere to be found. Instead, I found several desirable choices in my immediate neighborhood, with licenses, glowing references, happy kids. I was about as concerned with ratios as I was with regular feedings and diaper rash. IOW, I expected no problems, and I was right. As it turned out, it was like this thread. Those with the direst warnings were the ones with the least experience.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:06am
Are you ok? You didn't bump your head did you?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:07am
You are confusing yourself. Might be time to quit.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:08am
The WOHP will have to pay spousal support to a dependent spouse in the event of a divorce. If a dependent spouse doesn't ask for it and is in poverty like the gloom and doom she posted then they are working with a horrible attorney.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:11am

I will wait for any proof you have on this issue. Please post your data.

Didn't you say that you had 2 girls? How would you know anything about raising a boy? I would love to see you tell PNJ and PA that their boys don't get any cues from their mothers. That would be interesting.




Edited 2/15/2006 8:22 am ET by snoopyme

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:16am
That's why I tend to avoid the cereal aisle. Too many choices and too few actual differences. Life's too short.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:16am

First of all it isn't just women. If my DH was a SAHD and I WOH and we divorced a court would order me to pay spousal support because he is a dependent spouse. Ever hear of alimony? My DH co worker has a wife that is very successful. They just got a divorce and he has custody of their DD. He receives an alimony check AND child support from her. He wasn't a dependent spouse but the courts awarded him the alimony because he side stepped his career in respect to being home with his DD.

***And you believe the working mom is not at an advantage because?***

I haven't heard of an employer allowing a Working mom to take extra time off because of a divorce. Not once have I seen it. I don't think the working mom is any better off. Again many families with dual WOHP have a dual WOH parent lifestyle. You lose one income and you are in big trouble. The SAHM will have to go back into the workforce yes. That will be harder. But when her lifestyle is led with a 1 income family it will easier for her to maintain the 1 income lifestyle.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:19am
You can't compare overall. That isn't a fair competition. Doesn't work that way.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 8:20am
Ok, so it is rare in your experience, but when you made the originally statement, you made it sound as if you had some sort of proof that is true across the board here in MD, and I wanted to point out that it is not. That has not been my experience, nor the experience of my friends, who have been and continue to use home daycare here in MD.

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