Who has influenced your sah/woh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Who has influenced your sah/woh
2912
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:39pm

opinion to DIFFER. What I mean is--is there anyone on this board or in real life whose opinion/reasoning/debating/facts started to make your thinking more to the middle? As in if you thought sah or woh was best & then after some discussion/thought, you began to think that whatever is best for each family--really there is no one best way, etc.

We just really needed a new thread here!!!!!!!!

VickiSiggy.jpg picture by mamalahk

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Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:26am
So if your baby is crying because he's hungry or needs his diaper changed, you make him wait while you throw in a load of laundry? Most sahms I know, including me, fit in chores, etc. when the baby is sleeping and at night. They don't take priority over interacting with your kids.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:35am
You are using the word "thriving" incorrectly.
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:39am
Well, my point *was* that one caregiver can give more attention to one or two kids than she can to four kids. I don't understand why you assume attentive parents will just do other stuff once the kids'needs are met, yet attentive dcps will spend their every minute interacting with their charges.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:39am
No, it is not on the same plane nor did I imply it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:41am
Yes, ma'm! Whatever...kind of like when I defined "to raise" using the dictionary and told I was wrong.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:42am
In the spirit of debate, I'll overlook the gratutitous insults and respond. The reason we hear more about poor othercare situations from WOHPs is because they tend to know more about them. But when it comes to poor home care situations, we hear about them from everyone. They're a little harder to spot, though, because they tend to have fewer people checking them out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:42am

You claim that because these things didn't matter to you, then Mom34101 can't make her "blanket" statements about parental care being more ideal. Well, it's been pointed out that society and lawmakers care about and demand that maximum ratios not be exceeded. How can you ignore something so important it's been enacted into law! It really proves Mom34101's statement that across-the-board parents care and thus sah is more ideal.

It's not about debate style. You're excellent at debate when you know you can win! It's about irrelevant tangents. It's about going on for days and days with Mom34101 instead of just admitting parents including yourself cared about ratios.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:46am
How do you "debate" subjective opinions?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:46am
Like I stated, when we were having the who is "raising my kids" debate and I deinfed the term "to raise" using the dictionary I was told I was wrong. Everyone had their own opinion as to what "to raise" meant. I have always thought of thriving as growing developmentally but that is just basic IMO.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 11:47am

"In order to keep men up, they must have someone they are above. That someone is women (evidenced by the rates of abuse against women and the salary gap)."

Are you suggesting that "rates of abuse against women and the salary gap" make men superior to women? How so? Could you please provide some proof that this is the case (other than your opinion of course)?

"You don't want the women self sufficient, you want them dependent but how do you convince them to accept being dependent on men?"

What a load of crap LOL! Are you suggesting that women who SAH aren't self sufficient, independent women? Could you please provide some proof that this is the case (other than your opinion of course)?

"You convince them that what they do is necessary, better, needed, etc, etc, etc...that there are things more important than money and autonomy,"

But what they do IS necessary, better, needed, etc. to those who deem it as such. You are aware that it is perfectly acceptable for women to CHOOSE to SAH, right? And yes, in fact there are MANY things more important than money. As for autonomy, are you suggesting that women who SAH aren't autonomous? Could you please provide some proof that this is the case (again, other than your opinion of course)?

"(while you go off to work and earn more money and autonomy not having to think twice about home because the little woman is there to take care of everything and you once you get home)"

Not having to think twice about home because the little woman is there to take care of everything and you once you get home??? Wow, you are seriously living under a rock in the dark ages LOL! Are you suggesting that this is an accurate scenerio wrt women who SAH? Could you please provide some proof that this is the case (again, other than your opinion of course)?

Why are you so keen to actively devalue women with such inaccurate and archaic stereotypes that are clearly far fetched beyond the extreme? Maybe it's something stemming from your childhood, some sort of physical or mental abuse you might have experienced, or perhaps serious issues with self-esteem?

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