Who has influenced your sah/woh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Who has influenced your sah/woh
2912
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:39pm

opinion to DIFFER. What I mean is--is there anyone on this board or in real life whose opinion/reasoning/debating/facts started to make your thinking more to the middle? As in if you thought sah or woh was best & then after some discussion/thought, you began to think that whatever is best for each family--really there is no one best way, etc.

We just really needed a new thread here!!!!!!!!

VickiSiggy.jpg picture by mamalahk

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:21pm

So anyone who does not feel that way, doesn't have common sense?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:21pm
If so, we're in trouble, since more moms are WOH all the time...
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:23pm

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I do not disagree with this. For you it was a better option. And like I have already admitted financially woh was not a financially better option for us. Getting my nursing degree and sah was a better option for the future.

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No, I do not support as many charities as I would like. College and retirement savings have been decent (I guess it could be better). However, *materially* I think we are fine. It has not been such as strain that I felt the need to return to work sooner. I would not live in a shack and send my kids to a lousy school just to sah. I would not have liked returning to work but I would have done it in a heartbeat.

Bottom line: I have never seen a real reason for me to return to work before now. At the same time, I have never understood why anyone would sah forever. I would go nuts once both my kids were in school sah all day. I never thought I would sah forever. So, maybe that is why I never fretted the financial aspect too much. Also, my dh has always made a very good salary.

Catholic schools are 8-10K? Wow, we pay $3500 per year.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:25pm
If you don't rank everything, how do you know for a fact that everything is rank-able?
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:25pm

"You mean, most SAHMs can afford to pay for excellent othercare and someone to help them with the household chores they no longer have time for once they WOH? I disagree."

Probabaly not. Unfortunately, I don't think most wohms can afford to pay for excellent othercare and someone to help them with the household chores either.

"Do you think the husbands of most SAHMs would suddenly support their wives if the wives decided to WOH 45 hours a week?"

Actually, I think most men would love it if their spouses could make a good living *and* do most of everything at home. ;)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:26pm

i tend to know when my child is crying because he needs something or is just whinning because he wants his cookie now instead of in 2 minutes. all of my kids had the ability to entertain themselves for a certain amount of time well before the age of 2.

on average i would say i do spend at least 2 hours a day doing things around the house that have to be done. i have three floors that need to be cleaned and they each take a certain amount of time. i have laundry, bills, a yard that requries some work, not much in the winter, i have several animals that require daily care, meals to prepare, kids to drive around, and then i have the few things i do for myself (occassionally read a book and my volunteer work)

i sah to take care of my family and part of that is taking care of the house and doing the other things i have mentioned. as i said before for me to wait until evening to do those things would defeat part of the reason i sah, having me sah prevents us from having to do those things in the evening, freeing up evenings for us to do things as a family. also as i stated there are alot of evenings when we are just not home, or some of us are not home. my kids have activities in the evening.
Jennie

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:26pm

This is really being taken out of context. I was responding to someone who was stating that women sah b/c we do nto know any better. Men are forcing us, etc. etc.

I was telling her that I do not need a study or time study to tell me that common sense tells me that I am a better choice for my children than othercare. That I am not being forced or falling for male propaganda.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:27pm
Sure it is a choice. The choose to marry these men knowing what they did for a living. They can still use othercare but it is more difficult.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:27pm
Asking you to compare apples and oranges....hmmmm. If everything divides up into better and worse (and you have stated in many posts that this "just is"), which is better? Apples or oranges? Comparing them should be fairly easy because your POV is that all things can be put in better/worse categories compared to each other.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:28pm
Let's not generalize about the underprivileged; I'm sure they're just like us. Some use othercare, some don't; some have confidence in their othercare, some don't. Most likely, some use othercare that's just as good as the care they provide at home.

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