Who has influenced your sah/woh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Who has influenced your sah/woh
2912
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 2:39pm

opinion to DIFFER. What I mean is--is there anyone on this board or in real life whose opinion/reasoning/debating/facts started to make your thinking more to the middle? As in if you thought sah or woh was best & then after some discussion/thought, you began to think that whatever is best for each family--really there is no one best way, etc.

We just really needed a new thread here!!!!!!!!

VickiSiggy.jpg picture by mamalahk

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:28pm

Exactly.


PumpkinAngel

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:29pm
You know, with welfare to work, I just don't think there are as many of them as there used to be. Somebody posted info from the census bureau not too long ago showing that the median family income for single-income families was very close to the median family income for dual income familes (I think that was for two-parent families, so it wouldn't have included single welfare moms.)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:32pm
in our area those things are not only not open after 5 pm they dont exist without at the minimum a 1 hour drive one way. my contention is that while tinder may call that an opportunity, because it is unrealistic is it really on opportunity.
Jennie
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:35pm
Actually, I don't think they're like us at all. Many of them are struggling to make ends meet, and that has a huge effect on their families and family life. They have less education than we do, which also has a big effect on their kids. They all have less money than we do, so they can't afford the best childcare while they're working.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:39pm

And now, as a light diversion, check out this Hollywood-teasing website where (among other things) actors and actresses are compared to household objects and ranked as either better or worse than those household objects.

www.fametracker.com

This week they are doing Alysson Hannigan (from Buffy the Vampire Slayer) vs. cloth napkins. I won't ruin the suspense and tell you which one they decide is better. But it sure does go with the amusing theme that all things MUST be rankable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2005
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:40pm

<>

That's a terribly unfair stereotype. Many women living on welfare are wohms. Underpaid, undervalued, doing menial labor that you or I would not even touch. But many welfare moms do work, off the books of course.

I know this from having deposed (interviewed) many in my former job, helping in a soup kitchen and in a battered women's shelter.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:46pm
the number of children living in poverty increases every year, so my guess is that there are still plenty of moms out there trying to raise their kids on welfare. i just think that any study that says that most sahm's are middle to upper class is probably not including those who have no choice about sah. but that is just my opinion and i could certainly be wrong.
Jennie
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:47pm
My kids have never had trouble amusing themselves (far from it), yet I put their needs before housework when they were small. I don't know many people with babies and toddlers who do evening activities---my kids were in bed by 8 at that age, so I don't see how that would really have been possible. Aren't your evening activities for your older kids?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:47pm

"Can you actually argue that taking care of their children should have less importance for men?"

Absolutely not. Nor am I attempting to make such an argument.

"I said that when men are equally likely to stay at home as women, then it will be respected."

And IMHO, SAH is worthy of respect regardless of the number of men vs. women who SAH.

"Yes, women working furthers progress."

As does SAH IMHO, regardless of whether it's done by men or women. Why do you think that women SAH = lack of progress, but yet men SAH = progress? Surely you can acknowledge that progress and change aren't necessarily mutually exclusive? IMHO, progress is facilitated by *increasing* the number of choices, not by *limiting* them.

"You can't very well expect men to take on more child rearing and women just do what they've always done."

Why on earth not LOL??? Is there some reason why an extensive system of trickery and bartering is needed simply for men to take on more child rearing? My dh doesn't need such a system. He actively wishes to be a highly invloved parent? Sorry, but I think all this silly game playing more or less defeats the underlying purpose of parenting. Shouldn't fathers freely CHOOSE to do right by their children, rather than be manipulated into it? Honestly I can't comprehend a POV that is based on such a blatantly deceptive agenda!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 02-15-2006 - 1:49pm

That's why I asked, it seemed out of place.


<>


Is this an individual perspective only?


PumpkinAngel

Pages