Why are working moms so angry and defensive?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Why are working moms so angry and defensive?
56
Fri, 02-24-2012 - 1:26am
This whole board is extremely scary to approach if you are a sahm and love doing it or at least feel you are doing the right thing for your child. The minute a sahm says my children love me at home or I don't want anyone else taking care of them during the day, the working moms immediately start making sarcastic remarks, such as "oh, I guess I am hurting my kids by working" or you start acting as if they are more intelligent or have a higher education than sahm's. Frankly, I believe the defensiveness and anger comes from guilt and insecurity. Maybe, deep down inside you think that your child wants you around more. Ok, start going crazy on me for stating an opposing thought that goes against the mob.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2012
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 12:31pm

Having to meet the needs/demands of the children, husband/boyfriend/commonlaw partner on a 24 hour basis.

Inadequate parking facilities at work.

Feeling unappreciated for all the work she does for her employer, boss, clients, etc.......

Having to worry about getting the children to the daycare center/school and then making it to work on time.

Having to pick up the children after school/daycare hours.

Working for an employer who does not provide day care services at work.

Having to go to the parking meter before it runs and having to put more change in the parking meter,

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 1:26pm

Qualify your last statment with the word "some".

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2010
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 1:52pm
Sharington wrote:

Having to meet the needs/demands of the children, husband/boyfriend/commonlaw partner on a 24 hour basis.

Inadequate parking facilities at work.

Feeling unappreciated for all the work she does for her employer, boss, clients, etc.......

Having to worry about getting the children to the daycare center/school and then making it to work on time.

Having to pick up the children after school/daycare hours.

Working for an employer who does not provide day care services at work.

Having to go to the parking meter before it runs and having to put more change in the parking meter,

“Clearly," said Arthur,"you're an idiot- but you're our kind of idiot. Come on.” 
― Markus ZusakThe Book Thief

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 2:07pm

Having to meet the needs/demands of the children, husband/boyfriend/commonlaw partner on a 24 hour basis. How is any of that effected by work status?

Inadequate parking facilities at work. Some have inadequate parking facilities at home, it's a minor inconvenience at best and more likely tied to where you choose to live rather than where you choose to work

Feeling unappreciated for all the work she does for her employer, boss, clients, etc.......My employers has been rather good to me lately, but my ungreatful children and husband...Feeling unappreciated at work or at home sux

Having to worry about getting the children to the daycare center/school and then making it to work on time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 2:09pm
Lol, I'll have to ask my husband if mommy guilt is because they are threatened by them in the workforce..

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 2:14pm
What is the difference b/w regret and guilt IYO?

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 2:19pm
I/We don't raise our kids to think they can have it all, Frankly I don't think that exists so I don't really understand your point of view there. Good for you who chose to WOH, I wouldn't be so quick to assume families with a SAHM are more financially strained though. Many of us chose to SAH because we can afford to be here and it works for us too.

 


 


Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 2:29pm
Regret is when you realize that doing something other than what you did would have been more pleasant, enjoyable, advantageous etc. Guilt is when you feel that whatever you chose to do was morally wrong. For example, I regret spending dd's early years in the US, but I have no guilt over it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 4:06pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Mon, 02-27-2012 - 4:19pm
jamblessedthree wrote:
What is the difference b/w regret and guilt IYO?

I refuse to feel guilty over something I couldn't help or avoid.

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett