Why does some people think women at home

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Why does some people think women at home
1494
Sat, 06-07-2003 - 1:02am
should do it all? I hear this and think why should a woman at home do every thing? Shouldn't it be whatever works? Shouldn't it be whatever floats the boat of the married couple? Confused on this thinking.

If you are home do you do it all? How does your DH or SO feel?

WOH do you do it all or do you split it? Do you do more or less since you WOH?

IQM

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 5:49pm
But the sah who takes 100 percent care of the housework and say 75 percent of the childcare isnt equal to the dh who does 100 percent of the income earning and 25 percent of the childcare? Nope. You are still talking money here.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 5:52pm
But the MONEY that they're working for is what is SUPPORTING the family. So it IS about the money. Duh!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 5:52pm
But your world isnt everyone elses. You cant make the blanket assumption that all sahms do the same thing or have the same schedule you did.

But I do understand that some people just dont do well with making use of their time. Sometimes its better to fill your days with work.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 5:55pm
But how do you know they arent?

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 6:05pm
This is the part that Cindy just doesn't understand (apparently from her postings)

"But your world isnt everyone elses. You cant make the blanket assumption that all sahms do the same thing or have the same schedule you did."

ITA!

Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 6:41pm
I'm not basing my assessment solely on my own world. I'm basing it on things like time studies that indicate that the amount of housework done by SAHM's is in the low 20's of hours per week, my own personal experience and the experiences of those around me. Housework just doesn't take a whole lot of time and child care is not a labor intensive undertaking that is time intensive. This isn't rocket science here. I know what housework and child care are like because I do them every single day and I talk to lots of other parents to do them every single day and their experiences are quite similar to mine. You don't have to SAH to know how much time it takes to clean a house or to know how labor intensive child care is! You just have to do it.
Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 6:50pm
I know how much work there is to be done because I clean my own house. I know how labor intensive child care is because I care for my own children. Surprise, surprise, my experiences are very close to other parents I talk to and in line with time studies on how moms spend their time. I've been a SAHM, I've been sleep deprived on maternity leave and I've worked part time. Being home is kind of like every day being Saturday only with less work to get done than when you're working because things don't get put off onto the weekend. There just isn't 50 hours of work to be done at home during the week. Heck, I don't think you can come up with 50 if you include the weekends.

I was not the only mom at the park on week days nor was I the only mom to attend moms group meetings on a weekly basis. The fact of the matter is SAHMs spend a lot of time on activities that don't involve work. According to one time study, SAHM's spend more time pursuing hobbies, nurturing friendships and sleeping in addition to more time doing houseork than WM's. Sorry, but you're not going to convince me that SAH is equivalent to being a WP. Not in this lifetime anyway.

Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 6:51pm
No TV at my dd's dc.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 6:54pm
I meant, how do you know that a lot of sahms arent doing much of the same in regards to educational experiences and such as dc providers?

We dont watch tv during the day here either.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 7:01pm
But I wasnt talking solely about housework either. There are a lot of other things sahps do besides housework and childcare. And to say that they spend more time *sleeping* is just ridiculous. ANYONE with small children, regardless of their work status, isnt going to get a ton of sleep.

No, childcare in itself isnt *necessarily* labor intensive. But like I said, it CAN be emotionally draining, esp. when every task or errand is accompanied by children. BUT...you cannot claim a desk job as *labor intensive* either. Mentally draining, sure. But thats the six of one and half dozen of the other.

It isnt rocket science, you are right. So why arent ya getting it???

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

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