Why does some people think women at home

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Why does some people think women at home
1494
Sat, 06-07-2003 - 1:02am
should do it all? I hear this and think why should a woman at home do every thing? Shouldn't it be whatever works? Shouldn't it be whatever floats the boat of the married couple? Confused on this thinking.

If you are home do you do it all? How does your DH or SO feel?

WOH do you do it all or do you split it? Do you do more or less since you WOH?

IQM

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:17pm
so then, if a SAHP is actually putting in more time than a WOHP, do you think the WOHP should be doing more of the housework than the SAHP?

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:18pm
Are you allergic to vegetables by chance?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:20pm
So, the only thing you can do to "work to support your household" is a paying job or cleaning the house? Or is cleaning the house not a part of "working to support your household" either?

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:21pm
I'm way too particular about the cleanliness and presentation of our home. Sometimes I even get on my own nerves lol

My husband is always saying "go to the pool", "go do this", "just sit down and don't worry about it", "honey, it is clean, don't worry, go on and spend the day at the movies". He wants me to do these things, he insists I do them, because after all these years he knows I'd stay home to clean behind the fridge or climb up and do all the ceiling fans instead of doing the fun stuff, instead of doing something for myself.

Like when he is taking DS some place he will say "now you do something for yourself, don't be cleaning, cooking, take the day off".

And I do him the same way. He will say the yard has to be mowed, the bushes need to be pruned and I'll say "no, I made you a tee time, golf clubs are in the car, go have fun".

We pamper each other.

Our house is spotless (people would never know how much I stay out by looking at the house, which is a good thing). I get the daily and weekly chores (as I've said over and over in this debate) accomplished....those things are changing sheets, laundry, dishwasher, dinners, etc. It is the heavy duty cleaning that something gets left over for my husband to help with (moving the sofas to sweep, those darn bookshelves that stay on my nerves because of the dust collectors they are).

Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:24pm
Actually it is but it just doesn't compare to working a full time job. The woman who cleans our house cleans the main floor in less than three hours with her 2 yo under foot and this includes buffing the wood floors to a shine!! She tries to clean 2 houses a day and doesn't work 8 hours at it. It's just not a whole lot of work. Seems like it but that's because you keep having to do it over and over again.
Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:25pm
If they are putting in more effort, yes but that's pretty hard to do when you look at what needs do be done in the average home.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:25pm
Well, then, I apologize. Anybody else remember who I had that conversation with?

Going to school and working FT - you must have a lot of energy. DH was doing that for a while (he works for an engineering company and still has not completed his BA - he has to finish it to earn the engineer title) but he hasn't since our youngest was born. It's alot - good luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:27pm
Molds, pollens, grass, several variety of trees, herbs (herbal tea if I liked it would be totally out), cats, horses (here I live right smack in the middle of horse country in Kentucky, wouldn't you know!), cig smoke, dust mites, all that kind of stuff. Mildews, etc. There are a few foods I'm allergic to but nothing that I have to specifically stay away from according to any of the extensive testing. For instance chocolate shows up but produces no reaction to it so I can eat all I want (well, after this gestational diabetes goes away following delivery, I'll be back to normal and my husband can bring me chocolates again). I'm allergic to a wide variety. I could never go to a natural, herbal diet or take natural, herbal medicines and all that stuff I hear about and see people taking (like vitamins, diet pills, etc). Flowers are big thing for me. And growing up and living in Ky is not the best place for allergies, in fact, it is one of the worst places an allergy sufferer can live. I've gotten better over the years. When I was small I could have no stuffed animals (my ds loves his so good thing I overcame that) and no carpeting, my canopy bed topping had to be washed like every 2 wks, I'm sure it was difficult on my mother although she never would let me know :o)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:28pm
Funny, i was wondering the same thing too as I perused this saga on playing & housecleaning. With all this fun, leisure, cuddling and icecream eating, I had to wonder when the housekeeping (and "deep cleaning") took place for this anal couple to keep this house immaculate, spotless and presentable . I read that post also and just figured that their guest must be waiting on the porch.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 10:31pm
Do you take claritin or allegra or do allergy shots. I have horrible allergies (trees, grasses etc.) and found that claritin changed my life. So I can sympathize.

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