Why does some people think women at home

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Why does some people think women at home
1494
Sat, 06-07-2003 - 1:02am
should do it all? I hear this and think why should a woman at home do every thing? Shouldn't it be whatever works? Shouldn't it be whatever floats the boat of the married couple? Confused on this thinking.

If you are home do you do it all? How does your DH or SO feel?

WOH do you do it all or do you split it? Do you do more or less since you WOH?

IQM

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 1:47pm
Actually we don't. My family eats as well as Todd English's. I'm a very serious cook and so is my husband.
Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 1:57pm
You're both secondary to the daycare and the school by that logic. Ridiculous.

How about if you both spent zero time with the kids? That would be better than one spending more time than the other too by that logic.

Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 1:59pm
So it's a great plan if you don't need to relax much and you only have one kid. I'd say that applies to most of the population, wouldn't you?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 2:03pm
Why would you make fun of her? I don't get more than an hour a day to relax either. Many people would be better off if they only had the number of kids they could afford, instead of just saying, "Oh, we'll worry about college when they're 18."

<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /> 

Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 2:06pm
Norms and averages and opinions. They don't apply to everyone. I'm glad to see you say it's not impossible. That statement, in itself, is a huge step in your 12-step program for gaining the ability to see the other side.

<>

Guess what? I do both, too. Remember? My job is easy and I love it. The days I'm home are much more stressful and hurried. Wow, do you think the reason we could both have such opposing viewpoints has to do with the ages of our kids, our dispositions, our expectations, the number of kids, their personalities, etc.?

Avatar for tickmich
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 2:20pm
Thanks. We only have one child becuase that is what we can afford. We want to at least pay for part of college. Also I felt that since my available time as a working mom would be reduced, I wanted to be able to focus on only one child in my free time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 2:33pm
Actually, equality defined means to have "the same quantity and size, the same rights and ability, having the necessary strength". I dont see money mentioned anywhere if you go by Websters, and it sounds to me like the woman mentioned has all the needed abilities to be considered *equal*.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 2:35pm
No, I don't think those spouses each have the same "rights and abilities."

<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /> 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 2:37pm
>>>I think I would have a very hard time spending any money on myself if I was not bring some of it in. I don't doubt though that others would disagree with me.

------------

I disagree... IF ... the decision for one partner not to work for income was a JOINT decision between the partners. If that was the case, and it was understood that one income would be supporting two people, then you (general you) should have no trouble spending some of the money on yourself.

Heck, why would a person *choose* to put oneself in the situation of not bringing in income if that person knows that the income supplied by the other person in the partnership is off limits?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 06-17-2003 - 2:37pm
He had a greater earning power and she had a greater caretaking ability for their child. So on the average they *are* equal.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

Pages