Why should I support someone else?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Why should I support someone else?
4426
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 1:24pm

Let me start by saying that I"m new here so this may have already been discussed, but this has come up in my office several times and I wanted to get some other views of this.

I do payroll for a rather small company so I know most of the workers and their wives (most of the workers are men due to the nature of our business). There are two in particular who's wives SAH. These two are up to their eyeballs in debt. I have bill collectors constantly calling for them. That part is really their business, it is annoying but I enjoy being rude back to the bill collectors, lol.

The part that bothers me is that both wives have been in the office wanting copies of X amount of check stubs so that they can go and get public assistance (I know because they told me that is what it is for)! Why should my tax money go so that these women can SAH? I know that not all families that one parent stays at home are like this, but I know lots that are. Heck, growing up we were always broke because my mother refused to work, but we weren't on any public assistance.

So, why should I pay for a woman to SAH? Why can't she go and get a job to support her family just like anyone else?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 11:20am

Before cell phones, public pay phones were plentiful. When I was growing up, I ALWAYS had to carry change with me if I was going to the movies, store, etc with friends, so I could call home in case I needed to.

Now with the proliferation of cell phones, public pay phones are few and far between and often time do not work. The near extinction of public pay phones has created a need for cell phones in some families. Maybe not a need as in food, water & oxygen, but I was very glad my son had his cell phone when he was with his friend and his friends truck got a flat tire. They lopped along to a tire store in a fairly deserted part of town that time of night, and the tire store was closed. His friends cell phone's battery was charged, and his friend discovered that his second hand truck did not come with the tool to remove the spare tire. I know these situations are few and far between, but I am glad that the boys did not have to walk home in that dark & deserted neighborhood. Also, after years of me depending on my son borrowing other people's cells to call me when the band bus got back to the school, I finally decided to buy 2 for our family.

You know, civilization survived before indoor plumbing, but now that we have it, there really is no reason to go back to using out houses. I'm not saying that everyone has to buy every whiz bang gadget that comes down the pipes either, but niether do I think we should all be living in caves, just because our ancestors did.

I don't live a bare bones, essentials only existence, and I doubt anyone on this board does either. Just because you have a different set of luxury items than someone else, doesn't make you less of a "conspicous consumer", just means you "conspicously consume" (or is the term excessively consume) different items than anyone else.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 11:21am
Me either, but I'm the type who likes some "alone time" - didn't you once post the same about yourself?

Sabina


Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea:


And love is a thing that can never go wrong; and I am Marie of Roumania.


Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 11:22am
If you read the thread, you'll see it was about much more than gifts for kids.

Sabina


Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea:


And love is a thing that can never go wrong; and I am Marie of Roumania.


Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 11:24am
My son takes band for a grade too, but we pay alot of extra fees, and even tho' it is not an "extra curricular" activity, his class takes place BEFORE school (a major pain in the butt) and practices take place in the evenings, as do most of their performances) So while techinically it is not "extra-curricular" in practicle terms it is, as all of it takes place outside of normal school hours, and we pay hefty fees for him to be in it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 11:25am
It's antique jewelry from my grandma, so who knows?

Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 12:03pm
Yep
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 12:03pm

"But I truly don't understand their appeal as something parents buy for their kids."

The idea of buying a GIFT for someone is to buy something that appeals to the recipient of the gift, not to please the gift giver.

Really, you seem OBSESSED over the fact that someone got their kid an IPOD for a CHRISTMAS GIFT. I really don't understand your obsession with what other people buy thier children as GIFTS for typical gift giving occasions. (birthdays & Chrismas) No one ever said that IPODS were an absolute need, so why you are going there is beyond me.

For someone who goes on and on and on and on about how IPODS are a big waste of time, you seem to be wasting alot of time on the computer going on and on and on and on and on about the evils of IPODS.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 12:25pm
It's not a question of gifts but of getting them for kids at all.

Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 2:16pm

Well, sorry you but you just seem a tad obsessed with the evils of IPODS, to the point that you think it is wrong for anyone to even buy one as a gift for a child.

I guess I just don't see what is so evil about IPODS (didn't you call them a devil's tool).
I can understand that you may not personally want to get YOUR kids IPODS, but honestly, I just don't understand why you think they are evil, that kids who want them are brats, and that no one could possibly want one for any other reason than wanting to be cool, or being a brat.

I also don't understand why you had to imply that anyone "defended" this item as being a need, no one said IPODS were a neccesity, and I think it is quite telling that you have to shade other people's words (implying that they said IPODS were a necessity) in order to prove the "evils" of IPODS.

Yes, IPODS aren't a neccesity, I would say most of what we own is not a neccestiy, but even you don't live a bare bones subsistence.

If you don't want to get your kids IPODs as gifts, then fine, so be it. But there is not need to paint the giving of an IPOD as a gift as a sign of a poor moral value system. Personally, my family has never subscribed to cable TV. Just not a preference for us. But I don't have the need to paint families who subscribe to TV as materialistic families with warped moral values, simply because they buy a different set of wants that I do.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 2:21pm
Hey, I like that, excellent idea !

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