Why should I support someone else?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Why should I support someone else?
4426
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 1:24pm

Let me start by saying that I"m new here so this may have already been discussed, but this has come up in my office several times and I wanted to get some other views of this.

I do payroll for a rather small company so I know most of the workers and their wives (most of the workers are men due to the nature of our business). There are two in particular who's wives SAH. These two are up to their eyeballs in debt. I have bill collectors constantly calling for them. That part is really their business, it is annoying but I enjoy being rude back to the bill collectors, lol.

The part that bothers me is that both wives have been in the office wanting copies of X amount of check stubs so that they can go and get public assistance (I know because they told me that is what it is for)! Why should my tax money go so that these women can SAH? I know that not all families that one parent stays at home are like this, but I know lots that are. Heck, growing up we were always broke because my mother refused to work, but we weren't on any public assistance.

So, why should I pay for a woman to SAH? Why can't she go and get a job to support her family just like anyone else?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 4:52pm
Putting the computer in the kitchen was originally for purely practical reasons, but we've come to appreciate the advantages very much with regard to the kids' computer use. I don't think we'll change that any time in the near future. Ds has never really expressed the wish to have privacy with his friends on the computer. Privacy with friends, certainly, but not really privacy+friends+computer.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 4:54pm
Hopefully it will all work out, but I do agree with Lois and others with older teens in that I probably don't have a clue about what is going to hit me in a few years :-).
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 5:19pm

I really don't have any safety concerns over my kids when they're walking around the neighborhood that a cell phone would address.

Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 5:21pm
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Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 5:26pm

It's not the fact of having music players and phones that I mean about adult prerogatives.

Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 6:09pm

I agree totally in regards to the phone. Plus when my dd had control of her own cell phone, I'd see calls coming in at midnight and such on school nights. Its the same reason she doesnt have internet access in her room-she is the kind of kid who would be up at 2am on the internet. I dont worry *too* much about inappropriate web sites, but she doesnt really have the self control to turn off the computer when its time (heck I'm an adult and *I* dont always have the self control to turn off the computer, LOL)

As far as the ipod, I dont care about what kind of music my child listens to by age 14 so that part isnt an issue so much. I cant really think of any genre of music I would forbid by that age. When she was younger, it might have been more of an issue, but by the time she was 13 or so we didnt censor her music choices. To me that is kind of like censoring books, something else I refuse to do.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2004
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 6:21pm

I agree. A teen needs to experience unsupervised time at home, but not every day. I didn't want it to be predictable that my teen would be coming home to an empty house.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 8:11pm
While there is very little I would worry about him listening to occasionally, I want to know if he turns to a steady diet of certain kinds of music. Plus, there is some racist/misogynist stuff out there I do not want in my home. Even if I can't hear it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 02-19-2007 - 9:50pm

From time to time? Of course.


For 3.5 hours 5 days a week?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Tue, 02-20-2007 - 9:04am

i think music choices vary depending on who kids hang out with,too..my kids humm to the soft stations i listen to. otoh,they don't dislike daddy's more alternative stations either. lol!! they like hanna montana and kidz popp (various artists singing old classics) now and while i wouldn't later refer to it as censorship,i would question what they were listening to if it all of a sudden became that heavy noise about sleeping around,racish trash.

the lyrics in some of the music today is downright nasty.

 

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