Why should I support someone else?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Why should I support someone else?
4426
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 1:24pm

Let me start by saying that I"m new here so this may have already been discussed, but this has come up in my office several times and I wanted to get some other views of this.

I do payroll for a rather small company so I know most of the workers and their wives (most of the workers are men due to the nature of our business). There are two in particular who's wives SAH. These two are up to their eyeballs in debt. I have bill collectors constantly calling for them. That part is really their business, it is annoying but I enjoy being rude back to the bill collectors, lol.

The part that bothers me is that both wives have been in the office wanting copies of X amount of check stubs so that they can go and get public assistance (I know because they told me that is what it is for)! Why should my tax money go so that these women can SAH? I know that not all families that one parent stays at home are like this, but I know lots that are. Heck, growing up we were always broke because my mother refused to work, but we weren't on any public assistance.

So, why should I pay for a woman to SAH? Why can't she go and get a job to support her family just like anyone else?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 01-24-2007 - 4:34pm
why?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 01-24-2007 - 4:38pm
Let me guess - for doing such a great job SAH with the kids?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-24-2007 - 7:55pm
Believe me, I was there the day my friend went and was a very easy process, no questions asked.
You would think they WOULD be helping people like your brother who needed it. Not my friend who was very able to get a job!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Thu, 01-25-2007 - 8:39am
Beautifully said!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Thu, 01-25-2007 - 10:53am

Yeah, but all she got for her birthday was a few posts on a message board.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Thu, 01-25-2007 - 8:13pm
How do you know that is all she got? Strange imo to imply you do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Sat, 01-27-2007 - 10:17am
Don't be so serious.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Sat, 01-27-2007 - 10:44am
Oh dear!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2006
Sat, 01-27-2007 - 10:23pm

Actually here (Eureka, California) you do have to be looking for employment while receiving aid. I used to be on aid, and you have to turn in forms filling out the phone number, and name of an agency, date you called and who you spoke to prove that you were seeking work. You had to complete a certain number of calls a week or your money would be lowered. You also had a deadline to find work. If you did not find work, they would take away your aid or lower it. Its called CalWorks or Welfare to Work. Its mandatory here. You are also only eligible for 5 years of aid.

I had my 1st daughter when I was 17 years old. I graduated high school 8 months pregnant. I went on to work as a waitress while going to college FT. I then met, and married my husband. I had my 2nd child in Sept of 06. My husband works FT, and I am a SAHM. I take care of our 4 month old, and my 3 1/2 year old, do laundry, do dishes, feed, clothe, bathe, take to dr's appointments, go grocery shopping, pay bills, etc. I do not sit on my behind all day. We do not collect aid, but there was a time when I once did. I did not plan on having a baby at 17, (yes I know I could have prevented it but things happened and there I was-pregnant.) but when I did, I worked, and went to college but still needed help, so I got on aid until I got things financially stable.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Sun, 01-28-2007 - 4:17pm

you are so right. there is no right time to have children imo,either....i remember when dh and i first got married and thinking once dh graduates,life will be grand. then he graduated. i remember thinking once we had a baby,life will be grand. we had a baby,then two. then thinking life would be grand if he only made {this much}. that happened...about 8 homes later,many cities later,three fabulous children later,i've come to the conclusion that life is what *you* make it. regardless of neighborhood,ses,family size,or job.

it's all about your attitude and how you ctdeal with it all.

 

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