Why should I support someone else?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Why should I support someone else?
4426
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 1:24pm

Let me start by saying that I"m new here so this may have already been discussed, but this has come up in my office several times and I wanted to get some other views of this.

I do payroll for a rather small company so I know most of the workers and their wives (most of the workers are men due to the nature of our business). There are two in particular who's wives SAH. These two are up to their eyeballs in debt. I have bill collectors constantly calling for them. That part is really their business, it is annoying but I enjoy being rude back to the bill collectors, lol.

The part that bothers me is that both wives have been in the office wanting copies of X amount of check stubs so that they can go and get public assistance (I know because they told me that is what it is for)! Why should my tax money go so that these women can SAH? I know that not all families that one parent stays at home are like this, but I know lots that are. Heck, growing up we were always broke because my mother refused to work, but we weren't on any public assistance.

So, why should I pay for a woman to SAH? Why can't she go and get a job to support her family just like anyone else?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 10:41am
I agee. I have used mine for many years. My mom insists to buy the kids new ones every year as they usually grow out of them anyway. Once they get older, they won't have to get one ever year.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 10:48am
Peter's on his second winter with his Old Navy winter coat, and it's wearing and washing well.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 11:02am

One of my local non-profit thrift stores routinely gives away clothing to the needy - but they depend on the cash inflow from paying customers to fund many of their efforts.

If you have issues with middle class consumers buying your castoffs, don't donate to a place that intends to *sell* the items. Give the items directly to a homeless or battered women's shelter.

Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 11:09am

it's funny how cyclical so many of these things are. when i was a teen and young adult, growing up in a college town, "vintage" was prestigious--a signal of wealth, artistic flair, or both. people who dressed in outfits made up entirely of new clothing were looked down on as insecure and uninteresting by people from just about every social group but the sorority girls.

comparably, when i was younger, home daycares were seen as a last resort for the desperate--kennels for poor families. now they are considered at least comparable to commercial daycares, and in some circles superior. and when i was younger still, my mother's decision to breastfeed her children was considered country, at best--low class, backward, ignorant.

i haven't followed this thread closely enough to chime in on-topic; all this just occurred to me when i saw some of the attitudes about used clothing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 11:20am
I am more like Lisa K's role on Friends. She wanted her furniture to have a history. We have refurbished two chairs from my college roomates grandmother's house. Our dining room table came from my great Uncle and Aunt's house, we just inherited some great old furniture from DH's parents (a dry sink and a real ice box). I love the table my FIL had made when he found a great old piece of wood in a barn in NE - it is 20" wide. I absolutely adore our coffee table that he made from a seat from an old wagon. The furniture my mom has from her family is wonderful too. None of it is terribly expensive- but it adds character and history to our home.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 11:45am
I still dont get what that has to do with shopping at thrift stores.

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 11:48am

I agree. There are many places one can donate in which there is no resale/profit.

Also, most of the thrift stores where I live (salvation army, church shops, etc) use the majority of their profit FOR the needy. So I dont think they really care who is spending $ in their store.




Edited 1/30/2007 12:05 pm ET by djknappsak

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 11:52am

Thats a pretty elitist statement, lol. What does the kind of house or who was wearing the clothes have to do with the clothes themselves? There is this great invention called a washing machine....

And havent you commented many times in the past how you barely make ends meet and cant save $ because your lifestyle is so expensive?

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 11:57am
But no giant head bows, right?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 12:11pm
Thank you for beating me to it.

 

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