Why should I support someone else?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Why should I support someone else?
4426
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 1:24pm

Let me start by saying that I"m new here so this may have already been discussed, but this has come up in my office several times and I wanted to get some other views of this.

I do payroll for a rather small company so I know most of the workers and their wives (most of the workers are men due to the nature of our business). There are two in particular who's wives SAH. These two are up to their eyeballs in debt. I have bill collectors constantly calling for them. That part is really their business, it is annoying but I enjoy being rude back to the bill collectors, lol.

The part that bothers me is that both wives have been in the office wanting copies of X amount of check stubs so that they can go and get public assistance (I know because they told me that is what it is for)! Why should my tax money go so that these women can SAH? I know that not all families that one parent stays at home are like this, but I know lots that are. Heck, growing up we were always broke because my mother refused to work, but we weren't on any public assistance.

So, why should I pay for a woman to SAH? Why can't she go and get a job to support her family just like anyone else?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:00pm

But that isnt what was being discussed. You seem to think that the bad parents of the world are the ones shopping at thrift stores and have painted anyone who buys secondhand with the same brush. Read back through your own posts and see how they sound.

No one has said they dont know bad parents. Its your comments about how *the kind of people who shop at thrift stores*.

Get the difference?

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-1999
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:02pm

What if they take that money they're saving on disposable items like clothing and investing it wisely so they can afford their child's Ivy League education in a few years? Let's see--designer clothes for a kid who is going to spill something on or outgrow or otherwise not be able to wear the outfit in a few months or an Ivy League education they will use for the rest of their life. Hmmmmm...that's a hard one! Not.


Not every frugal parent is blowing their hard earned cash on themselves. But some of do feel there are more important things in life than clothing. Clearly you disagree.

Christi babies
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2006
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:03pm
Darn, I was feeling pretty good about millionaire self, you've brought me back down to earth.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:04pm

Lol, read my post below, I shop for myself at thrift stores quite often and know tons of people (most middle to upper middle class) who do too.

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:04pm
I totally understand that and while I know that clothes are not a priority to many people (as long as they have something to wear, they are happy), the people that they are important to, don't always lack something in their family. I know that there are plenty of people out there just trying to "show off" and buy expensive clothes and things for their children so people will think they have tons of money when they don't.
I know plenty of people who do not make alot of money who look very nice all the time and I also know people who have tons of money who look like slobs. My problem is with the parents who spend money on themselves before their children on Christmas decorations for their homes, expensive home improvements, bingo, cards, etc. and their children have no coats or coats that are too small or too big for them to wear.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:05pm
I am sure there are others out there like you but are you buying expensive suits for work there? The millionaires that I work with need to dress nice all the time and I doubt they are buying expensive clothes at the thrift shop to save a buck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2007
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:05pm

Nope, outlet stores exist to sell only last season's and last year's clothes that did not sell in-season. That's why they are discounted - yet new. The manufacturer/designer wants to guarantee quality so discounts their un-used goods at outlets.

I can't conceive of anyone calling poor people the "unwashed masses." Are you exaggerating, I hope?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:06pm
Well my cashmere was marked down from $90 to $30 and it is the warmest sweater I own.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:07pm
I have said over and over again that I know not ALL parents are bad that shop at thrift stores but the ones that are used in my area are use by LOTS of parents who put themselves first.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-1999
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 12:08pm
IME, the ones who flaunt their money are the ones who can least afford to do so. Appearances aren't everything. Lots of people can look very affluent w/o having two dimes to rub together--my DH sees it ALL THE TIME in his business. OTOH, my ILs look like your normal middle class boomers and have a net worth in excess of several mil. You can't always tell by looking at someone.
Christi babies

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