Why should I support someone else?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Why should I support someone else?
4426
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 1:24pm

Let me start by saying that I"m new here so this may have already been discussed, but this has come up in my office several times and I wanted to get some other views of this.

I do payroll for a rather small company so I know most of the workers and their wives (most of the workers are men due to the nature of our business). There are two in particular who's wives SAH. These two are up to their eyeballs in debt. I have bill collectors constantly calling for them. That part is really their business, it is annoying but I enjoy being rude back to the bill collectors, lol.

The part that bothers me is that both wives have been in the office wanting copies of X amount of check stubs so that they can go and get public assistance (I know because they told me that is what it is for)! Why should my tax money go so that these women can SAH? I know that not all families that one parent stays at home are like this, but I know lots that are. Heck, growing up we were always broke because my mother refused to work, but we weren't on any public assistance.

So, why should I pay for a woman to SAH? Why can't she go and get a job to support her family just like anyone else?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2007
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:16pm
But you do? LOL. That's silly. It kind of defeats the purpose if you're going to claim you know the portfolio statements and capital worth of the Millionaire Next Door.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:18pm
There's a lot of selecive vision on this board. You, for instance, can't see the millionaires who shop in thrift stores, but there's a statue by Michelangelo, his masterpiece in fact, in St Peter's in Rome, right up there next to Bernini's Baldachino, that only one person on this board has ever seen. Pretty amazing, really.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:19pm
I would think that most thrift shop clothes are either last year and many years ago styles. Kids who want the latest styles are not going to find that in a thrift shop. And you can not tell me there has never been a peice of clothing your kid "had" to have and it cost more than a buck!!!
My dh's cousins got their clothes at thrift shops years ago when they were "poor"-long story. They might have been name brand but you could tell they were not in style anymore.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:20pm

Most people understand that their experience does not quantify as fact, ie; anecdote does not equal data. Its being able to realize that just because this small group of people that you supposedly *know* so well to make this judgement call do not necessarily fit as a generalized description of *thrift shop* people, as you so nicely put it.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2007
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:20pm
Thank you for explaining. I own neither, but the quality of the superficial items about the Lexus - the leather, the service, the stereo, the interior - is better than the Toyota. So, you're right that Old Navy is poorer quality and less expensive than the Gap, and for a reason!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:20pm
Not as much as ones that people have worn over and over again. You don't know how often some people wash their clothes.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:23pm

Defensive? Hurt feelings? Over what?

I like to mix my vintage with my high end fashion items myself. And I've found some awesome secondhand items with labels like chanel and Yves, lol, do you think that only the poor donate or re-sell their clothes?

The defensiveness seems to be coming from your end, not mine.

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:24pm
Whatever. I guess you will never believe me that I don't just know one type of people. I have said over and over again that thrift shops might be different in different areas and maybe different people go to them but in my area it is geared towards certain people. I have known people who frequented them and others who never would. I don't know just one "type" of person. I have met many many people over the years and am using my experience from that. If someone only knows one type of person, they certaintly have never left their own town. And yes, there are people like that. My mom lives in a town who have never left their own town, never traveled.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:24pm
Yes, with special techniques you can see stains that might otherwise be invisible. But SO WHAT??? There is nothing infectious alive on them after you wash them. The only thing problematic with a stain is that it's unsightly. And if you are aware that DNA is not an infectious organism, why did you bring it up as evidence that infectious organisms could survive washing and drying? I said that infectious organisms die in the washing/drying process. You said- what about DNA from murder victims clothes used as evidence? What do those two things have to do with each other? DNA is not alive. (And police don't wash the evidence- that would remove the DNA.)
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:24pm
I think some people are saying that just because we are older and CAN afford more things doesn't mean that we want to buy them. Like your in-laws and their Toyotas. If the Toyota meets their needs, why would they buy a Lexus? If I can find jeans for three bucks at a yard sale or a thrift shop, why would I pay forty full price or twenty on sale for them?

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