Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
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| Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm |
It struck me today that she might not.
I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.
She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?
She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....
I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.
Andrea







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It sounds as though your father wasn't a very involved parent, and may not have been even if he didn't WOH and/or if your mother did WOH. You do realize that is not the case for all parents who WOH, of course.
They may care when they graduate and they cannot afford to move out on their own on an entry level salary because they cannot afford rent in addition to loan payments, and therefore their career options are limited. I'm not saying they will necessary resent you or their situation, but it is a detriment when starting off in one's adult life.
You must be extremely fortunate to have the ability to afford to care for your parents' (and in-laws') needs full-time when the time comes, while still being able to support your own family. The cost of simply providing food, clothing, and shelter for additional adults in one's household, not to mention out-of-pocket costs for transportation and medical equipment and supplies, plus the time that is needed to care for the elderly, is not something that most families can easily absorb. I know that I am grateful that my parents planned ahead and saved so they could manage these expenses themselves, as well as have choices about the type of care that they prefer if it comes time that they cannot care for themselves.
There is no excuse when you are given 2 years notice.>
So are you saying that you had an admission to your wedding?
Yes. We. Did.
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