Will my child remember that I was a SAHM

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2007
Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
3712
Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm

It struck me today that she might not.


I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.


She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?


She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....


I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.


Andrea

Two Delicious Daughters Call Me "Mommy!"


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:05pm

<<No, I said I know that they give money as they are given envelopes, not gifts.>>


So you are tracking the gifts to know that there is money in those envelopes?


<>


I think it depends on the person, but I really don't track gifts as a guest at these events, so I can't tell you for sure.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:06pm

Right field?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:06pm

Again, I haven't seen any evidence to support that theory.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:06pm
Just out of curiosity, what prompted the couple to get married in Maine? Were all of the guests from OOT?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:08pm

<<So, again, what are you not getting?
Clue me in.
>>


Once again, I have no idea where you got that from.

PumpkinAngel

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:08pm

as a Maine native I can say that there is no more gorgeous spot in the world to get married...unless of course it's the end of december and there's a blizzard and 1/4 of your guests can't make the wedding....

not that that happened to me of course! lOL

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:13pm

....that they were attending and needed to buy a gift to cover the plate cost of the wedding.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:15pm
Why would it make an invitee unhappy? The benefit of having "save the Date" be far in advance of the actual invite is that a person gets to know the date but doesn't need to commit with an RSVP for a couple months. If anything, it helps the invitee because it gives them far advance notice but with no expectation of an RSVP which ought to make things easier for somebody who gets so many invites that a conflict is likely.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:15pm
I know. I was just joking.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 3:16pm

Oh, trust me, I love Maine. It has an especially fond place in my heart as that is where dh lived the first year of our dating. In fact, my first time there ever, I drove *alone* from MD to Maine to visit him. In January. Need I say more? LOL, it started snowing when I reached the outskirts of Boston and by the time I crossed the NH border it was a full fledged storm with cars skidding off the highway. I ended up getting snowed in (well, I probably could have dug my car out but it was a good excuse for staying an extra day!). Anyway, I agree it is a beautiful place - dh and I went back about nine years ago but went up to "downeast" Maine, quite far from where he lived. Someday we will take our kids up there and visit the town that where he lived.

I was just curious how the couple decided to have their wedding there.

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