Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
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| Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm |
It struck me today that she might not.
I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.
She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?
She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....
I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.
Andrea







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You know what? One of my dearest friends attended both my 40th annivesary party and my baby shower without givine me a gift and I could care less. I love HER. not her wallet and not her gifts. and if I'm invited somewhere and I say 'can I bring something?" and the hostess says 'no' then I don't. I remember throwing a bridal shower and buying and setting up all the food ( i don't cook ...that's what caterers and deli trays are for) and the grooms realtive ALL brought food they expected us to put out without telling us they were doing so and it got so out of hand -- WHY couldn't they respect that we had it under control and didn't need 18 more cookie trays....
and I usually try to send my gifts before a wedding to the brides home but if I can't get one in time for the wedding i make sure to send it within a year which is acceptable. And for it being "not fair" to "make the bride and groom wait" -- if that's what they're spending the first year of their marriage worrying about then they have some big problems....
Yes. We. Did.
but surely you understand how categorical statements like "I would NEVER..." can be seen as judgemental and insulting to those who have made difference choices. And as a working single mom (I worked pre divorce too...I like to work) with an elderly parent in a nursing home I have the feeling I"m pretty much the anti-parent/anti-daughter in your book.
Yes. We. Did.
<<I guess it is the way you are raised. >>
How I was raised?
PumpkinAngel
Right field was a question, not a statement.
PumpkinAngel
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