Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
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| Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm |
It struck me today that she might not.
I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.
She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?
She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....
I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.
Andrea







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.....and not everyone posting here lives in the US.
PumpkinAngel
Well, the scoreboard at my MLB clearly states to what for objects leaving the field, but those are bats and ball....which of course makes sense, at least in a baseball game, lol.
PumpkinAngel
Most weddings are "somewhat exclusionary" unless you invite everyone in town. One place we lived growing up, that was the idea. You had a church wedding, it was announced in the church bulletin and understood the whole congregation was invited. Receptions were invariably cake and punch (no dancing or alcohol and God Forbid you showed enough leg to throw a garter, but the bouquest was OK). Kind of charming in retrospect.
Ain't no way I would ever attend a Caribbean resort wedding, but I have to assume that anybody throwing one knows that and would be send an invitation for the sole reason of getting a present from me, not because that person truly wanted me at the wedding. Whether I came through with a present or not would definitely depend.
actually, her statements seem to indicate that she thinks that people should get excited about things and do it HER way. I've never indicated that my way is the only way to do it.
She's indicated that my way is thoughtless and insulting to the people that I told(paraphrasing her words here) because I wanted to tell people the minute that we had a date set. She's indicated in so many words that I was, in fact, "wrong" for doing so because it puts "pressure" on the recipient.
No, she's the one indicating that it needs to be done the way that SHE would do it. I've claimed no such thing. I would love to get a save-the-date notification if any of my friends or family were getting married. I would be so happy for them. It would never occur to me that the notification was intended to make me miserable and feel under pressure to take my pencil to the calendar (insert eye roll here).
carole
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