Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
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| Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm |
It struck me today that she might not.
I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.
She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?
She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....
I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.
Andrea







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I don't care how wealthy someone is. Gross materialism is never attractive. I would suggest that you try to catch an episode of "Sweet 16" on MTV. Lovely young ladies...blech!!
Robin
You know how close I am to my financial planner? Every time he has an idea about how to invest my money, he calls me and tells me about it. And DH and I discuss his idea, and call back and say yes or no. I had no idea what his wife's first name was until we got the invitation. The only reason I know he has kids is because there is a family photo on his credenza, which is obviously out of date.
I don't have anything against the Caribbean, but we prefer to spend our vacations at historic sites and/or cultural events. Hanging around a resort just isn't our idea of fun.
And where, exactly, does Emily Post say that your gift must cover the cost of your plate?
Robin
why assume the worst? I would assume that they wanted me to know about and share in their special day, hoped I could make it, but surely would understand if I could not because of the distance.
it would never occur to me that they "only" sent the invite to get a gift from me.
Carole
I have been reading the same posts that you have. I don't see any such attitude.
Robin
Yes. We. Did.
I'm glad that no one I know feels as you do. They were all thrilled to know that we were getting married.
Tacky? Not at all.
Carole
Good for you. As I said, anyone who knows us well enough to want us at their wedding knows that we wouldn't be travelling to the Caribbean for their ceremony.
We've had one unfortunate experience with a distant cousin of my husband's sending us an invitation to a distant site that we were actually, and coincidently, going to be visiting just about the time of their wedding. When we called the bride's mother to inquire about some logistical arrangements, she made it quite clear that when they sent the invitation, they had no idea we would actually attend! It was just a "courtesy invitation!" Which of course required a courtesy gift!
Some people don't understand the difference between a wedding invitation and a wedding announcement.
Excuse me if I don't take your word on what "class" is.
Robin
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