Will my child remember that I was a SAHM

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2007
Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
3712
Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm

It struck me today that she might not.


I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.


She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?


She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....


I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.


Andrea

Two Delicious Daughters Call Me "Mommy!"


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 7:15am
Um, I did not make any false statments and I believe it was you and she who made false statements about me!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 7:16am
Okay but your use of child rape is a strawman. we were speaking of dollar dances.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 7:16am
was it you who mentioned a man marrying a 12 year old? if not, then I apologize.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 7:54am
I know that - the poster I was referring to specifically mentioned Bermuda, the Bahamas and a few islands in the Caribbean. I didn't mean Bermuda was an island in the Caribbean, but that she mentioned a few islands in the Caribbean (I don't remember if she was specific, I just know that she mentioned Bermuda and the Bahamas). I just didn't word that very well to make that clear.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 8:12am
Have you ever been to the caribbean? You don't have to stay on the resort when you are there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 8:12am
It was a party at someone's house for a communion.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 8:34am
I won't be. There is no way an invitation to a destination wedding would ever pose a dilemma for me. Even if it were my future daughter-in-law doing the inviting.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 8:35am

If that were to happen, the relationship between my son and myself would have already deteriorated to the point that the wedding on top of the mountain would be the least of my concerns.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 8:52am

this is my 4th large affair that i have run....2 weddings, 2 bat-mitzvahs...i have kept a detailed gift list for each event. I use my excel spreadsheet (that I used to address the invitations) and just add a column on for "gifts". Then when I go to write thank you notes, I can just refer to my list to reference the specific gift.

Seems like a no-brainer to me. I assumed everyone kept that sort of a gift-list when throwing a large party.

Carole

Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 10:34am
LOL:) You are kidding right?

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