Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm |
It struck me today that she might not.
I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.
She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?
She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....
I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.
Andrea







Pages
<<I NEVER said that people were not important as I have had all my kids' christenings' and communions' at my house because I could not afford to do it in a big catering hall and invited the most important people in their lives to them but there are people (not saying you are one of them) who just have no manners whatsoever and think they should get everything in life for free.>>
Expecting guests to cover the expense of a party that they are invited to with either cash and/or gift?
PumpkinAngel
I've continually said that my way is not the only way to do it. Send save the date cards. Don't send save the date cards. I don't care any which way. I certainly don't denote the sending or lack thereof as "tacky". THAT in itself is a judgment made by sm that indicates that she thinks that not sending one is the ONLY way to go -- otherwise one is "tacky".
i haven't taken the hard-line position here. she has. send them or not.
Carole
Well, no. There truly is such a legal thing as spousal rape. It's harder to prove, but it does exist.
Then there is the matter that there is no such thing as statutory rape within a marriage. This I think is a huge problem that needs to be corrected legally. There shouldn't be any state in the US where the age of consent to marry (with parental permission) is lower than the outside-marriage age of consent. If a child is considered too young to consent to unmarried sex, I think they are also too young to consent to married sex. This perverse inconsistency is the thing I'd like most to see changed in statutory rape laws.
I was wondering that as well. I think that what she was saying was that she didn't expect any gifts but that all but one person brought them. As far as I can tell, it seems to have been sort of a Surprise Party Holy Communion, I think, except one person forgot. Maybe he or she forgot that it was a First Communion party and thought it was a pay-for-view prize fight, where evidently no gifts are expected, even on Long Island and then lied, being all embarrassed about being at the wrong occasion. It's all very confusing.
In any case, these events all sound so very interesting that perhaps I would be willing to pay the admission charge, or plate charge, or whatever it's called, just to watch.
<<The only person I trashed was the cousin who bounced her check. >>
You forgot the people who brought their teenager and only gave $100, but
PumpkinAngel
Pages