Will my child remember that I was a SAHM

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2007
Will my child remember that I was a SAHM
3712
Wed, 06-06-2007 - 7:47pm

It struck me today that she might not.


I was sure I was doing the best thing for my children by staying home with them (two daughters-3 years old, and 4 months old). As I was talking to a dear aunt of mine (whose daughter is a working mother, since her infant was 12 weeks old), I felt my defensive bristles go up.


She went on and on about how "If she could do it all over again....she wouldn't have stayed home....." Then she told me a story in which her ds said to her, "mom, did you stay at home with us, or did you drop us off at daycare?" She almost died when he asked her that, because she stayed at home with her ds and dd until he entered kindergarten. Granted, many kindergartners haven't formed lasting memories by that age yet...but still. It got me thinking; is this ALL WORTH IT?


She was using it in her argument against staying at home. I have a Masters Degree in Counseling that I am not using. My career lies dormant at this time. We don't have cable, newspaper service, vacations, frills of any kind, new cars, etc. because of our money situation. We are middle-class and have sacrificed SO MUCH...only for me to hear from my aunt that..."her daughter needs to work to maintain their lifestyle." Yeah, driving a Volvo, she probably does....


I just need to hear from some of you who frequent this board and have solid opinions one way or the other on this topic.


Andrea

Two Delicious Daughters Call Me "Mommy!"


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 9:27am
ot but we were reminded of that at mass yesterday. our priest was talking about summer vacations,went on to say that vacations should include the discoveries of mass at other parishes then finished with a "no drive through masses allowed"....lol.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 9:36am

I am a little behind on this board so forgive me if this has been pointed out.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 9:38am

Certainly my children couldn't handle 12 hours days and neither have ever attended a dc or a before- after-school care that was open 12 hours per day (the before- after-school care at the kids' school runs from 7-5:30). But I wouldn't categorically state that no child could handle 12 hour days, just as I couldn't categorically state that no adult could handle 12 hour work-days. I know a few who routinely do work 12 hours per day and manage just fine. I couldn't, I like working shorter days :-).

Just a question on the side: do afterschool care systems in the US really leave children in the same building day-in and day-out? Swedish afterschool care teachers usually organize an outing of some kind at least once per week: swimming, badminton, various parks around the town, local museum tours etc. I thought that was pretty normal?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 9:42am
I remember him as Noah Drake on GH.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 9:46am
In my nephews daycare, they require the children to lie down at a certain point in the day. usually they fall asleep, but if they don't, they have to have quiet time. Speaking only of toddler ages. I'm sure that the workers do need this time to take a breather, as the children need it also. Just as a SAHM needs a child to take a nap or quiet time, these dc workers ahve the right also.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 9:49am
For some reason I thought her children were homeschooled and then one of them started going to public school recently, so she's privy to alot of info just getting her feet wet in that school. It kind of makes me wonder about the people who have access to my DD's info. She seems to be ignoring my posts, so maybe she will answer you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 9:50am
n/t
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 10:02am

I am so confused.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2007
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 10:09am
I hope outdoor exercise is normal, if only for the sanity of the teachers! We don't have an afterschool program here.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 10:10am

You have stated that you have the right to judge these families. Yet you have also stated that you don't have the facts to report them. You are judging them without facts. So from your posts, you are presuming guilt without a trial, or in other words, jumping to conclusions.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

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