WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 10:24am

Totally OT, but I'm wondering if you might have any recommendations....I have a 10 yo who has been absolutely obsessed with viruses and bacteria for the last 4 months or so. He wants the details: how a particular microbe works, what the symptoms are, why those symptoms occur, what diseases are more dangerous than others (and why) etc. etc. (it's been our main topic of conversations during car rides, at the dinner table, at night before bed...). Anyway, we've done our best to answer everything, but we are both more cell/molecular biologists and don't really know much about books available in the field. Would you happen to know of any good book that is geared towards kids, but with very detailed information? He understands the concepts at a very high level, but would definitely enjoy more fun text and pictures than what is found in the average textbook on the subject. Any web links would be wonderful as well.....

Thanks!

Laura

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 10:27am

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I thought there was no such thing...that everything was equally fun and enjoyable with kids around? Wasn't that your claim?


Meldi

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 10:33am
Balance would be key. See, I have a kids in my life at this point. I have ideas about things I'd like to achieve, for myself personally, with the family, in my professional life. I can't do them all at once anyway. I pick the ones that make sense for this time in life. Alot of our achievements have been fairly family centric. Makes sense - the kids won't be kids forever. Some stuff can wait, some stuff can't. Much as I decided in my late teens and early 20s that focusing on academic achievement was the thing to do and having a family could wait. The family is now here, it has the primary focus for awhile.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 10:35am

Well, usually with examples like that, we'd consider various compromises.

Karen

"A pocketknife is like a melody;
sharp in some places,
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 10:35am
Never.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 10:50am
The camping trip was fine. It rained a lot during the day so that was a bit messy but the kids loved it. I did feel a moment of surrealism (don't tell QM as I don't have time to debate what is surreal and what isn't in my life) when another camper parked her Lexus SUV about five feet away from my tent's front flap and she proceeded to unpack her designer camping gear. She's a nice lady but really, the Gucci logo fishing cap was a bit much and the teensy dog she carried around was slightly annoying but highly fascinating to my three year old who kept asking to see the "pretend dog or is it a cat?" I was starting to regret that I didn't have highlights put in for this event and that I had left my Louis Vuitton sleeping bag at home but when she shared her Hammacher Schlemmer marshmallow roasting sticks with me, I got over it and started to feel better. (I didn't know MAC made mosquito repellent?)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 10:57am

Because mandatory quiet time doesn't ammount to mats and lights out. Thats why. Its quiet time - not pretend you are sleeping time. Even if it did, of course, its a group thing. Not an isolated by oneself in a bedroom thing.

But lets go with your scenario - mats out and lights off = quiet time. If 2 yr old outgrowing naps caused the stress you write about, no daycare accepting 2yr olds could function. Obviously. You should ask yourself about that. By your theory, a dc can convince several 2 yr olds to lie on mats quietly wiht lights out. You can't get one to lie on her bed. Why would you think that would be? Just curious.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 11:33am

All the books I know of are geared towards adults. For a year, I taught microbiology at the most basic, beginner's level geared to non-scientists. But all adults. There are some VERY basic texts out there, but they presume adulthood, even if no science background. One thing I did use that a child might like was The Microbiology Coloring Book. It is, in fact, a coloring book. But not a simplistic one. I used it to make slides for an overhead projector. It seems to be geared towards college freshman who would get a kitschy kick out of learning microbiology from a coloring book. But a 10yo might feel patronized. Sorry I can't be more help. I've never looked into books for kids because I've never needed to. I only ever taught non-scientist adults.

And in keeping with the theme of "do what you love" which qm thinks is a myth, I dropped teaching after 3 semesters (it was a night class after my regular job) because I HATED it. It was just torture. There may be some overlap between teaching an interested 10yo and teaching an English major, but I dunno. All the web links I know of are for adults too. I think the problem is 1)I've never looked because I've never had to and 2)the market for children's microbiology texts may be so tiny as to not make it worth it to publish one. All the kids' books I've come across have been basic biology because it's assumed that even the most science-y kid (like I was) wont get past the generics of biology like cell division.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 11:52am

I really find this to be a great kid misconception.

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As far as I can see kids don't make particularily many of their developmental changes gradually in any way that is relevant to day to day life. And they don't do it in one direction either. Lots of back and forth and sideways. Sometimes I think the whole milestone concept needs to be tossed. It doesn't include sufficient imagery for the going backwards part and forgetting all about having already made it to the milestone in the first place. Messes up alot of parents. Who desperately want to see forward only, or manage to believe that if only a toe has touched a milestone, that doesn't really count, its not part of the real process until both feet are squarely planted there and progress must be halted until the child is full ready to JUMP to that next milestone, perhaps skipping over some less desireable milestones in the process.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 12:04pm

Sounds like our struggle for good material is not without basis :-). Thanks anyway! I took a look at the Microbiology Coloring Book and I think I might actually order that one this summer. It's a start anyway and it might be a good fit for dd (who is equally obsessed with microbiology and a fanatical arts and crafts kid) if it doesn't work out for ds. I'll happily take a couple of adult websites if you know any particularly good ones?

Laura

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