WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:21pm

"You never want a break from kids and kid-themed stuff? Never-ever-ever?" I don't find it necessary or desirable to do only kid-themed stuff with my kid and never have. Neither do I find it necessary or desirable to avoid him.

There are things I enjoy doing which are nearly impossible to do with him along. I generally do those things when he is in school.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:26pm
Mine is in a rec league too. Heck, they don't even keep score yet. I'd be annoyed if an ump were giving the children the impression it was OK to stand there and argue and perhaps even lie to get the ump to change the call, as that wouldn't be very good preparation, either for the more advanced leagues, or for life in general.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:34pm
Oh, I'm not advocating that you teach him to lie, either. I didn't realize the umps actualy asked the kids about the calls. If he isn't asked, though, I would recommend that he just accept the call, whatever his own opinion about it might be. The umps usually know more than the participants about who is out or safe, anyway.
Congratulations! I'm so happy to hear it. I just heard the good news and popped back over, just in case you were still checking in.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:44pm
It's rare, but it happens that an ump will admit that he didn't see what happened clearly and will ask the kids. Like maybe twice last season it happened to my kid -- 20 games. We're pretty casual -- half the time they have to pull a parent out of the stands to be the first base umpire or whatever. It reminds me a lot of the pick-up games we used to have at the vacant lot at the end of the street when we were kids. Not a bad thing at all in my book. But that may be just me, just our preference.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:50pm

<>

You have two kids, but you still don't know the answer? The kid who needs a quieter evening has one. It's pretty simple, really. If DS1 feels quiet, he goes upstairs and reads or plays with action figures for a while. If DS2 feels quiet, he lies down next to the dog and talks quietly with her. When the quiet kid is ready to interact again, he interacts again.

Congratulations! I'm so happy to hear it. I just heard the good news and popped back over, just in case you were still checking in.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:59pm

Sounds nice. DS's T-ball is similar. They don't even have outs or games at all. When one team gets up to bat, every kid gets a chance. You swing till you hit it, or until a coach steps in to help you hit. Then you run to first, while every kid on defense chases after the ball to throw it to first. When the last kid has batted, the inning is over and the teams switch places.

But when he gets up to baseball, with outs and everything, I will want him to accept the ump's call, even if it benefits him unfairly. Yes, if he's asked he should tell the truth. But if he's going to have to put up with the vagaries of ill fortune (a bad call against him), then I want him to experience and accept some of the good kind, too. It's a good lesson, IMO.

Congratulations! I'm so happy to hear it. I just heard the good news and popped back over, just in case you were still checking in.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 8:21pm

I dont know. My hot button issues seem to be bigger than the piddley little *does this really matter over the long haul* stuff. Things like being kind to others, respect and politeness, honesty, integrity and valuing family.


I want my kids to be good people (and so far, I think they are). I'm less concerned with whether or not they finished dinner on a particular night. If they chose a friend I was unsure about, I'd look for the good quality in that friend that must be there somewhere-because I think my children are good judges of character. I might limit time they spend at the friends house if I think the friend might lead them astray somehow, but the friend would always be welcome in our home, unless they did something outright that kept me from trusting them (like stealing or something).


I dont have a hill to die on. I'll save my energy for the mountains and precipices of life. Not the hills.


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 8:23pm

My best girlfriend who has 4 kids is the one who has taught me how to mellow out and focus on the truly important aspects of parenting, not the little stuff.


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 9:11pm
<> I absolutely agree. When my boys were younger I'd try to get them to dress according to the temperature outside. It was like talking to the wall. Now if they go out and they're cold, they will either stay cold or they will come in and get a jacket. We've had chilly mornings in May. I've mentioned to DS2 in the morning that he might need a jacket. Nope, he doesn't want one. If he's cold, he'll figure out quickly that he should have brought one with him to school.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 9:14pm
I celebrated my most recent birthday with 25 other adults, lots of great wine and food and nary a child in sight.

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