WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 11:31pm

~H~A~P~P~Y~

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 11:43pm

Very happy, albeit belated, birthday greetings to you. . .


Sorry we missed it. . .


Virgo

Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 11:49pm
Happy Birthday! Hope you had a great day!-nt

Dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 2:38am
Mine were inseperable all through their early childhood. They even slept together in the same bed every night even though they each had their own rooms. Then DS#1 went off to middle school, developed stinky feet, and an attitude. It was really, really hard on DS#2, but in the long run beneficial because he has reached out in the last year and developed his own circle of friends (he used to kind of tag onto DS#1's social circle) and become something of a leader in the 8-10 year old set in our neighborhood.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 5:57am
My post was just about sleep. Sleep is not a milestone. EVerything I've heard, read and experienced has been consistent with a child sleeping most of the day (a newborn), then gradually going down to 3 naps, then 2, then 1 and then no naps.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 6:20am

I've spent time trying to understand what my pre-verbal children were thinking. It's hard. Especially where sleep fighting is concerned. And I usually don't fully understand what they might have been thinking/experiencing until much later, such as the day after a wakeful night or even days/weeks later when a phase is clear.

<> I disagree. If a 2 yr-old child has been napping well, then suddenly and inexplicably stops napping altogether, it's possible it's just a blip and it's best to wait it out to see if a now cranky and unhappy child has in fact given up napping.

It's possible the child has given up napping prematurely. I think 2 is a little early. Then the parent has no choice but to accept it and figure out other ways to make the 2 yr-old happy and no longer overtired and cranky with circles under its eyes.

How do you help an over-tired, cranky 2 yr-old with circles under its eyes?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 6:48am

In many things with older children, you can hopefully reason, talk it out and compromise.

But WWIII can easily happen with pre-verbal children, and that's where the sleep issue reached miserable proportions for me. You can't reason with an overtired, cranky 1 or 2 yr-old who has refused to nap for 3 out of the past 6 days. You can't just ask if she's decided she's no longer napping at all, nor can you ask how to help her overcome her daily crankiness and the circles under her eyes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 6:54am
Good, so DS2 avoided one of the pitfalls of close sibling bonding. Are they happy at all to be together these days?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 6:55am

<>

Wouldn't you want to intervene and be more aggressive if you see your child's feelings get hurt 9 and 10 times by a "friend?" Isn't that part of parenting?

You can ask Dogma, but I certainly don't allow into my inner circle of friends people who mistreat me 9 and 10 times. I wouldn't lower my standards for my children in the pursuit of appearing to be an "easy-going" parent. That smacks of trying to be a child's friend rather than his parent, and I don't think that's a good way to parent a child of tender years.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 6:59am
"I really like what I do also - and who I am. They are different." Good. Do you think it's otherwise for me or something?

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