WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:25am
nt
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:26am

I'm not saying that you shouldn't do it your way.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:27am
I don't think it's either. I also think the control road you are on has the potential to turn very ugly on you in the years to come if you don't lighten up. Doesn't the fact that you are so doggone unhappy as a parent say anything to you at all about how things are going?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:27am

What?!?! Do you actually expect broken limbs and stiches to be normal if a child under 7 is let out of sight around other children? Not QM, but with my kids, never.

Laura

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:27am

Okay, okay, I'm going to stop posting to this thread.


Meldi and LTB and I have similar ideas (and children) when it comes to sleep, and so far as I can tell, the rest of the posters don't.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:39am

Ditto here. My DDs were in day care over 7 years between the two of them. At nap time, all the 1s, 2s and 3s were sacked out, every day. Sometimes the 4yo's had quiet time in a different room. Otherwise, I would have had a problem with it.

I truly do not get this nitpicking back and forth about the obvious fact that kids are all different. Guess I'm just a newbie here, but I truly do not get it. Anything for a debate, I guess, but it gets sorta dumb, IMO.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:40am

My son remembers tons of things he saw and did at age three and sometimes even earlier. For me, dh and especially my son, it's totally worth it to take him to do something fun whether it be the fireworks or anything else. We live near Sea World in San Diego and right next to the Zoo and have year round passes. So summer is filled with Nights at Sea World and Nightime Zoo (so much fun). We will stay to watch the show they perform in the entrance and fireworks display at 10:00pm. If he is looking tired we will leave early. but mostly he loves to stay and watch the show.

He really isn't cranky or so out of sorts the next day that it wouldn't be totally worth it. He isn't and never was on such a strict schedule that we found it to be a problem. And if he was a little tired the next day, it was never anything a nap couldn't solve.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:41am

Well goody for you too. That wasn't the point. The point was that wanting to avoid the cost of a babysitter is not usually the reason people plan these kinds of get-togethers with children along....they plan these kinds of get-togethers with children because they actually want to spend some time around the kids, give the kids a chance to experience something new and/or play with good friends.

If that kind of socialising doesn't work for you because of your children's sleep needs, by all means get a babysitter. Obviously, we enjoy very different kinds of parties (and yes, I do enjoy the adult-only kind sometimes too).

Laura

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:45am

I dont think you are doing something wrong. But what I dont understand is that you complain that your childrens strict schedules and inability to function for any length of time outside of their home environment cramps your style and holds you back. However-that is a situation YOU created. Children are wonderfully adaptable, when given the chance. I can understand your desire to raise your children in a very controlled environment (okay I admit, I dont really understand-but I respect your pov), but then you arent happy with that very controlled environment that you have created and imposed on your entire family. And then you label parents who have children that they have raised to be able to function socially outside of home, to travel, to go to restaurants and not throw food on the floor, as slackers???? When you would rather NOT have to teach your children these things at an early age? Really, who is slacking here?


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:46am

Mine work best with even numbers....one friend for each and it's amazing.

PumpkinAngel

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