WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:35pm
Zero.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:39pm

I would have had to force them to stay awake, lol....it's hard to explain to a child that they can't sleep yet in their stroller/carseat because we weren't home and they weren't in their bed.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:41pm

We used to take John fishing all the time.

Karen

"A pocketknife is like a melody;
sharp in some places,
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:42pm

What do I call it? First of all, a misrepresentation on your part. What I did say was that it should be a big red flag to you if your children CANNOT PLAY with other children for five to ten minutes without your direct personal supervision because they can be counted upon to start a fight, break something, or otherwise require your "discipline" (your word). What do I call what I said? A completely fair statement. If I take you at your word as to your own children, one of the following must be true: 1. you are SERIOUSLY underestimating them, 2. they are SERIOUSLY undersocialized, or 3. you are disciplining them for something (like getting their clothes dirty at an outdoor party) that about 95% of the population would thorougly expect them TO BE DOING.

Your transparent and completely gratuitous attempt at a jab at Lois certainly didn't fool me either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:43pm

Quote the posters who said they want to inflict their whiney, cranky, ill mannered children on their friends. I challange you to find even one poster who said that.

What posters DID say is that 3 and 5 year ols are perfectly capable of playing for longer than 10 minute stretches.

<<<<<>>>>>

You needs to clarify. Are we talking about whiney, cranky children? Or are we talking about kids being kids? Because you do know that kids will be messy and loud WITHOUT being cranky and whiney. Those are two entirely different animals.

<<<<>>>

Who does? But why do they have to be cranky and tired? Why can't they be kids being kids hanging out at a party? As far as adequetely supervise, I am still not sure what you definition is. My child can play unsupervised for long stretches with out any major mishaps. If there is a problem I'm on it. Do you think I need to be sitting next to him while he is playing?

<<<<>>>>
So do I.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:45pm

I love having the ability to deal with less-than-optimal conditions easily. I love not being flustered by things not being just perfect all the time. I love finding creative solutions to everyday problems, especially under duress.

Today we have no power at my house, huge huge storm in the wee hours of the morning. Since we are on a well, we also have no water. I got a kick out of walking to the lagoon to get a pail of water to flush the toilet. I got a kick out of watching the kids decide what to have for breakfast that didn't include cooking or toasting. I got a kick out of my dh saying, "Let's see if this Right Guard Extra Strength means you really don't need to take a shower the next day!" I got a kick out of the whole morning, watching the kids discover how dependent we are on electricity.

I could buy a back-up generator for days like this. I could have twenty gallons of water stored in my closet. I could plan for every possible thing that could ever go wrong. But I really don't mind having to get creative and live a little differently every once in a while. It kind of makes me feel more alive, to be honest.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:46pm
LOL.. once dh bought a big ol fishing lure at the flea market, and he forgot to take it out of the backpack with the rest of the stuff we got... so I reach my hand in there to get something out and jab myself with one of those three prongers! OW

***Charles***
Lilypie Baby PicLilypie Baby Ticker


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:46pm
Why, thank you! (Psst, by the way, the kid is 7, he pretty much manages to wash himself when he gets dirty, if it saves you worry about my precious time.) Why would a change of sheets when they become dirty require doing anything "extra?" Oh, let me guess. Because you only wash sheets on Day X, and if you were to do them on Day Y because they were dirty, you'd still strip them off and redo them on the following Day X so that you could stay on schedule! Ah. Not the way it works here.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:49pm
He might just have a point!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 12:50pm

What suffering? I'm sorry, but I don't view the whole "spending time with children" as something akin to being on the cross. And maybe I'm deluding myself, but there happen to be other adults in our lives who like my children. My 5yo doesn't need naps. My 2.5yo usually does. If the younger son doesn't happen to need a nap one day (which is completely age-appropriate), then he goes to bed a half-hour earlier and generally sleeps a half-hour later. No big deal. He might ask to go to bed earlier that evening, but he certainly doesn't cause anyone any suffering.

Why? What sorts of suffering does Joey inflict on your friends?

Now let me ask you a question. What measures do you take to see that your kids' social and emotional development needs are met? We know that fun is not valued (fun, btw, is the lay term for active learning in children, not an unintended byproduct of slack parenting). They're not allowed to learn how to resolve conflicts among friends. So at what age will you back off and let them learn how to interact with other children without your supervision every 10 minutes?

Congratulations! I'm so happy to hear it. I just heard the good news and popped back over, just in case you were still checking in.

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