WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2004
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:15pm

Your butt is dragging because you're a mom -- not because your kids wake you up at night. Just think about all that you do: work, take care of kids, clean house, etc etc etc. We all live exhausting schedules. Just last week, for example, I worked all week, then had to attend a bar mitzvah on Saturday. The temple part lasted until 2:00 PM, then we had to go do the actual "lunch" -- which lasted until 6:00 PM. The next day we had to attend a b-day party -- a skating b-day party that lasted three hours. Before the party I did chores, walked the dog, yada yada yada. Come Monday morning, I was *exhausted.* And this weekend we have to get up at 4:00 AM on Saturday to drive to Long Island for yet another bar mitzvah.

I get a full eight hours of sleep and while I wake up rested I never feel truly energetic. Not like I did before I had DS.

mom_writer

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:15pm

Cool. . .my mom had a similar surgery done, but she couldn't describe it well at all.


I'll have to keep this in mind.


Virgo

Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:16pm
It's ok for you to get bent out of shape (ripping him limb from limb) if your DH didn't inform you of an illness of DS', but Meldi and I are solely responsible for our responses if we are informed of an illness?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:19pm

I was stressed in the first place about leaving. I was in Mexico because I was in a wedding that was planned while I was pregnant and didn't really know how hard it would be to leave. I was excited for the break but I was worried about the baby and about dh being alone with her for the first extended period of time.


So, no, if I *had* known, I wouldn't have flown home, I don't think, but I would have had a crappy time for the rest of the trip, feeling guilty and worry.


I guess *for me* there is a big chasm of worry between flying home and not thinking about it at all.


Meldi

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:22pm

See, I can't figure this out. One minute your child just had a stuffy nose and trouble sleeping and a cold that checked out fine on a regular sick child visit, and then we get posts like this where your child is suffering "breathing problems" and yet your husband doesn't bother to take her to the ER.

If you believe your DH acted appropriately and that the child wasn't even sick enough to require him to take her to the doctor right away, why would it be the least bit amazing or impressive to get all worked up about it because you were on a trip? My husband certainly doesn't get wracked with worry when DS has a cold when he's on a trip, and didn't, even when DS was very young. Let me guess, is this supposed to be another thing that women are supposed to feel differently about than men because of the presence of boobs?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:22pm

"I guess *for me* there is a big chasm of worry between flying home and not thinking about it at all." There would be for me too.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:22pm

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Me either, sista. I can't believe how tired I am in the morning. Sure, I am breathing much better, but it takes me a good hour or two (and 1/2 a pot) to feel awake and normal.


Meldi

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:25pm
Oh, no, I didn't suggest that, where did you get that idea? Hide from each other anything that would cause the other any consternation if you don't handle consternation well. Forever if you'd like.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:29pm

You are not supposed to feel any way at all.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Tue, 05-24-2005 - 3:32pm

Honestly, this is what I know about the situation:


Aspen had a cold and was having a hard time breathing because of congestion. This was during the night. Now remember, my dh is a deep sleeper and never had to get up with her, ever. So, when he fianally woke up, she was really 'scaring' him (what he said). He said that he almost took her to the hospital but decided to sleep on the floor in her room and take her to the ped in the morning. He took her in first thing, she was given medicine and then he stayed in her room till I got back.


That is what I know and I am glad that he didn't call me and tell me in the middle of the night call and ask for

Meldi

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