WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 3:56pm

I don't, hence the God willing. Whether or not I'm geographically close means little to me, though. Airplanes are there for a reason.

Is 4.5 hours away "geographically close" IYE? Because I lived that far away from my parents from age 18 until age 36, and still saw them in person on average 4-6 days a month or more.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 3:58pm

Okay, I feel better knowing that you were thinking more about PNJ's situation (makes sense since you were replying to her, lol). I didn't want to complain...today's been a rough day and I'm tired.


I ache for some time alone. Just some time alone in the house. I resent having to go somewhere or do work in the yard to get some alone time. I just don't like that somebody is always here, lol.


There are so many things, honestly. I do love hanging out with the girls. Like after bathtime when everything's 'done' for the day and we are reading books and everyone is fed and diapered and getting cozy and sleepy.

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 3:58pm

Way off-topic:


How is your mom doing? I have been helping mine move and have a garage sale (5th circle of Dante's Hell) and I was thinking about her. I was so shell shocked those first couple of months. Auto pilot. I don't know if I really ever felt...so I hope she is doing allright.

"Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction."


Advice on greeting your DH from Housekeeping Monthly (1955)









"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 3:59pm
I'm not sure about that. Can you really be said to lose something you no longer want?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 4:03pm

What can you not do with children that you could with children....


I am thinking..


The first thing that came to mind was sex on the living room couch but you could...


Walk around naked all day...never did but you could with kids


Shop in peace and quiet but you could leave them at home....


I have it! I know.....I would love to have never seen the Thomas the Tank movie with Alec Baldwin and I would love to know nothing about Fairly Oddparents and Barney. If I did not have children, I would be happily ignorant. Also, my vagina and my bladder would be in tons better shape!


But...I could have had a C-Section and had a better vagina and bladder and I could not let my kids be exposed to mass media.


I guess the answer is nothing! Nada. Zip!


"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 4:04pm
Yes, I do. Quite a few. But they didn't WANT children. They chose not to have them because they believe that they are happiest childfree. Are you telling me that you wanted children, but not the lifestyle that goes along with having children?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 4:08pm

Triple Post!!


I promise I will never tell you I wish they were two again. I am not fond of two--the tantrums, the frustration, the potty training.


My favorite stage is 3.5 to about 5. I love the age Alex is now. He is so much fun. The world is full of curiosity and adventure. Zak was wonderful at that age too. They are potty trained. They are sleeping. Tantrums are pretty much gone and they are at the cusp of boyhood. A line between baby and boyhood and they are adorable. Love it.


I have to admit eight has been pretty cool too. Zak and I have awesome conversations and watching his mind develop has been awe inspiring. Now that I have converted him to my political beliefs, we have fun watching the news. He is a kick lately.

"Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction."


Advice on greeting your DH from Housekeeping Monthly (1955)









"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 4:11pm
But maybe you want more than one thing and you have to choose among them. Tonight, DS#1 and I want to see "Kingdom of Heaven." DS#2 wants us all to roller blade together. Both are good. Whatever we choose, we will have to give up something. When DH and I had our first child, we gave up a number of things -- separate residences in different parts of the country among them. I still miss our Bay Area life a bit --- but not as much as I want us all to be together most of the year. Opportunity costs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 4:19pm

Thanks! I swear I hear it once a day. My mom says it's because the women saying it (yeah, it's usually always women) are just pining for their younger days. They really don't want babies again.


My mom lives 13 hours away (by car) from me and 3 from my brother. I think sometimes that she likes it that way. She gets to see us when she feels like it and it's an exciting 'event' for everyone. I wonder if I'll feel the same when the girls are out of the house.


Much of this conversation is reminding me of a conversation I had with my sil once. She hates, hates seafood. But what she hates even more is all the people constantly telling her how good it is, that she's really missing out, "How can you NOT like lobster? Haven't you ever tried it?" She gets

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 4:26pm

I got to go to a job interview (for a job I am not sure if I want but probably should take if offered. Grrr...) but...


I had a discussion with Zak's teacher. I was afraid Zak was behind on reading. He does not really enjoy reading fiction books--he is all about non fiction books of lists or space books. He does not read that often. So, I asked her and she looked at me in amazement. She said, "He is doing really well. He is actually ahead. Why do you think he might be behind?" I told her my reasoning.


She said, "Oh. You are one of those like my husband. Believe or not, some people don't really like reading. They don't enjoy it. Zak might be one of those people."


My heart actually hurt. How can you not like to read? How can you not read? It is unfathomable to me. I had a roommate in college that had never checked a book out of the library or bought a book. She said she wouldn't know what she liked so she never has read anything outside of magazines and school work. Like I said, I can't relate.


Perhaps the parenting is hard conversation is like that...

"Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction."


Advice on greeting your DH from Housekeeping Monthly (1955)









"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

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