WOH and sleeping issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
WOH and sleeping issues
2315
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:34am

We were at a dinner party last night at the home of one of dh's coworkers. They have 2 boys, 6 and 4. They have a bunch of sleeping issues (kids 'scared' at night, won't fall asleep in their own bed, won't go to bed without mom or dad cuddling them, etc.) The mom blames herself because since she works all day and misses them so much she tends to cuddle with them late at night and they fall asleep in a pile on the bed all together. She said that if she SAH, they wouldn't have the same issues.


I sah. For us, bed time is a rigid, welcome respite at the end of the day. Dh has no desire to keep them up either, lol.

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 05-30-2005 - 11:26pm

Nope, I only know a few. And I think that doesnt sound like such a great life, to not take a vacation in years.


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 05-30-2005 - 11:27pm

By world standards, thats very little. By US standards, its probably average.


And good for you for making that million. I still have time to make mine AND travel. ;o)


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 05-30-2005 - 11:28pm

By statistical standards it is. People *are* having children later, but I think the average age is still somewhere between 27-29.


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 05-30-2005 - 11:30pm

I havent been yet, but I've heard disneyworld is an awesome adult vacation place. I take it you havent been there either? I know several couples who went there on their honeymoons and had a total blast.


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 5:45am

<>

Um, no, it didn't. It all started because of the insinuation...yet AGAIN, I might add, because this is not the first time this insinuation has been made, that answering a child's nighttime needs was really just poor parenting in the form of bad sleep habits and guilty consciences over not being with the children during the day.

And, I might add, it was started by YOU.

It's REALLY disingenuous to start a volatile thread like this, only to blame US for the parts of the discussion that make you uncomfortable.

Karen

"A pocketknife is like a melody;
sharp in some places,
flat in others,
and really annoying when it's stuck in your head."

Karen

"A pocketknife is like a melody;
sharp in some places,
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 6:30am

Because it's a fun place even if you are a single person with no children? Have you ever been? It's a very popular first-time-honeymoon destination. DH and I went before we had DS.

Believe it or not, some single people with no children really don't avoid children. And not everyone who is single with no children has the slightest interest in any of the things you listed. As a single person with no children, I'd have had more interest in having a root canal than 3 of the 4 things you suggested single people with no children would like. My gosh.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 6:37am

What a ridiculous comparison. In most districts, it's the teacher's JOB which isn't important in the summer.

The bigger the law firm and the more people who could "cover" for you, the less apt you're likely to be to take all the vacation time to which you are entitled. Wouldn't want people to notice they did NOT miss your personal participation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 6:41am
I was basically never around small children, had never once babysat, and hadn't studied child development before having DS either. Toss in the "I'd had a blissful childhood" too. Wasn't remotely shellshocked by parenting or child care. In fact, was very pleasantly surprised. It can't all be prior exposure.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 6:46am

OK, it's easy then. Don't allow your kids' eating and sleeping schedule to control what you do. Have conversations that last for more than 10 minutes when they will have no interest in interrupting you. Don't worry about their mood - what a waste of time THAT is. And don't discipline them every 5 minutes.

Let me guess. You are powerless to do anything like this, because that would make your life even worse. If so, your only option is to suck it up and learn to deal with it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 6:56am
Depends on what the "it" is. If the "it" which is "under control" is our kids, I doubt it, and might expect the opposite - I can't speak for Suzy but I try to "control" my child as little as is necessary. He's to control himself with as little interference from me as possible. If the "it" is parenting, Meldi's statement may be fair, as IME, a large part of parenting is the ability to roll with the punches. That I think I do pretty darn well, and I strongly suspect Suzy does too.

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