WOH/Kids/Feminism: WDYT?
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| Tue, 02-08-2005 - 9:06am |
Okay, let's debate something else. One morning a few months ago, I was crabby to DH about having to get ready for work. DH said, "Well, if you don't want to go to work, quit!"
Later that day, I told him I was just venting, and then I told him some of the reasons I really do like WOH. One reason was something to the effect that I wanted to WOH as part of at-home feminism for our DD's. He said he had no idea what I was talking about.
I thought about it some and decided that although this is a heartfelt idea for me, it's still fuzzy. I suppose I meant that I want to show my DDs how to live independently of a man, in the sense of income, ability to make one's way in the world, and so on, even if they choose marriage & kids. My feelings of pride in my own mom, who was a WOH mom, come into it, too.
Caution: I don't mean in any way to suggest anything the least bit negative about SAH moms. That's not what this is about. Nor do I mean to suggest that anyone has to WOH to teach their kids feminist or gender neutral values. That's not what this is about, either.
Do you think there's any value in WOH as part of raising kids? Please help me clarify my thinking.
Sabina

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Wow, that's amazing. On my WAH days, though, depending on where I start, my commute could be as few as 10 steps (from the kitchen -- quadruple that if you "start" me from my bedroom upstairs).
I think the terrible commute is one reason why I know lots of WAHMs here.
What do you think those with milk allergies and lactose intolerance do? ;)
Calcium requirements by age: 1 - 3, 500 mg; 4 - 8, 800 mg; 9 - 18, 1300 mg.
Some good and inexpensive sources include:
Cheese (*can* be inexpensive) (Velveeta- block @ $4 minus coupon for 40c that gets doubled to 80c= 32 servings breaks down to .10c/serv. a serving contains about 200mg's)
Powdered milk (can be used in recipes etc. rather than as a beverage) 1tsp contains, I believe, 50mg's.
Parm. cheese (cost is good for serving size) I paid $5 for a container with 90 servings. That breaks down to about a nickel per serving. (a servng being around 130mg's) Compared with .12c for milk when it's on sale at $2. (19c when it's $3) (about 300mg's)
Fresh turnip greens (and other dark leafy greens) can be obtained for around .60c/lb (1/2c serving) (about 100+mg's) Not sure what that breaks down to as far as how many servings in a pound with 1/2 cup servings though.
Eggs (about a dollar a dozen) .8c/serving (about 55mgs)
Calcium fortified bread (about a dollar a loaf) NO idea how many slices in a loaf, but figure 300mg's per two slices.
As for getting kids to eat certain things- well... One of DS's favorite foods is broccoli ;) Studies show that kids are predisposed toward liking certain foods if their mothers ate them while pregnant- so it goes to figure that if the parents eat healthy, the kids will learn to and may even be predisposed to. Also, when the kid gets hungry enough, they'll eat it if they don't have another option available. Getting creative also helps. If one stirs in pureed or finely chopped dark greens to a tomato soup with grilled cheese, that's a hefty dose of cheap calcium right there. Between the cheese, fortified bread, dark greens and soup (often condensed soup has added calcium as well- probably around 30mg's or so) in one meal most young kids (8 and under) could possibly have a day's worth of calcium right there.
Wytchy
Lucky you.
Wytchy
Sounds like you (perhaps rightly) associate the trouble with your parents marriage with the sale of the house. That trauma would then not be *only* related to the sale of the house, but to your parents marital troubles, which would probably make more sense for some people as to 'why the trauma'...
Wytchy
Why does it have to have anything to do with what anyone thinks of dual wohp families? Just because someone doesn't want to have that situation for their family for whatever reason doesn't mean they somehow think that dual woh families are "of the devil" or something LOL! ;) I don't have anything against dual woh families, we just feel that having the quality and consistancy of having one of the two people who love our children most in the world at home with them is important for us. We also don't want the chaos and schedule issues that both of us working would cause. By me being home I'm able to handle care of the children and the domestic tasks that need doing and then everything is done once DH is home and we can relax and enjoy just being together as a family, rather than doing all that in the evenings and on weekends and cutting into that fun time. We also want to homeschool as we feel that it offers the best opportunity for providing a superior education for our children. In order to do that full time, one of us needs to be home. For all of that, we're willing to live 3hrs away from family in an OK school district (rather than a *good/great* one, since we don't plan to utilize it anyway, but if situation arose where we needed to, we could supplement their education at home.)
Wytchy
Never said you (dual wohp's, *or* you personally) *were*.
Wytchy
That makes absolutely no sense based on the post you were responding to *confused*
Wytchy
Since I get jumped on for using the edit feature around here I'll just make another post. Went back to figure out wtf you were meaning, and here's my edited response:
OK, so your family won't suffer. I didn't say that suffering was an issue- I said that in almost any case the budget would take a hit if a wage earning spouse were to die. So unless you are completely banking one of your incomes, you aren't going to have the cash flow that you once did if either of you were to die. Even then, if you *were* banking that money, you would no longer be. Unless you're suggesting that in the event of either spouses death either one of you could instantly increase your own salaries to the level that you share combined, which I doubt is the case... Although if it is- good for you! ;)
Wytchy
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