Working for Lifestyle/Extras

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2005
Working for Lifestyle/Extras
3621
Mon, 11-20-2006 - 11:13am

Hi Ladies :)

This is my first time on this debate board and I have been dying to jump into some of the topics, but I feel as though they are sooooo long (one in particular is over 1000 replies, yikes!) that starting my own specific one might work out better.

Anyhow, a recurring theme here seems to be what Moms should and shouldn't be going to work for. It seems some are of the opinion that is OK for Mom to work if she must to pay her bills but NOT if its to afford a nice car, house, good neighborhood. This is considered keeping up with the Johnses (who are they???) and thats bad.

Well, I want to know what in the heck is wrong with a women working to have nice things? I don't mean working and leaving baby in child care 16 hours a day, everyday...thats pretty extreme.

I enjoyed a certain lifestyle before having a child, should I have downsized that lifestyle once baby came so I didn't have to work? What about me *wanting* to maintain a certain lifestyle for myself, my husband, and my child makes me a (a) workaholic or (b) striving to keep up with the Joneses?

Don't some people (like myself) simply enjoy living in a nice place with nice things and want their children to have the same experience?

So please, anyone who thinks a women is wrong for WOH if she is not doing so to financially survive but does it to maintain a certain lifestyle...whats wrong with this?

Thanks all :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 1:39pm

When you ask people what they think of the state of education today, they'll say it has gone to hell in a handbasket. But when you ask them how satisfied they are with their schools, far more of them say they're satisfied. A lot of people think their schools are high performing when actually they're not.

It's understandable that a school or district would be focused on raising their test scores to a point where 90 some odd percent of students test at grade level, especially considering these tests are by no means rigorous. But that doesn't necessarily mean they're also abandoning high achievers. And the fact that they've changed their approach away from ability grouping doesn't mean they have no approach to providing for high achievers.

I'll admit, though, that it's very hard to do. That's why I cheated by moving to a district where almost all the students are high achievers. School achievement, I'm afraid, is largely about wealth and class in the U.S.

Sabina


Oh, lifeis a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea:


And love is a thing that can never go wrong; and I am Marie of Roumania.


Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 1:55pm

The fact is that, from what I was told (not a perfect source I grant you, but still it was a small community where I knew many people) high achievers were indeed more or less abandoned once the focus became the test scores. I am not even talking about ability grouping here, this district never had a GT program, for example, just in-class accommodation/differentation, which is what inclusion advocates usually argue will be happening. The reason there was no GT was that the district was considered so high-performing that it was not necessary. In the county generally, GT programs tended only to be available in more "diverse" districts with overall lower performance.

This is a typical upper middleclass suburb, the sort of place people move to when they have kids. I was never very impressed with the schools and I remain underwhelmed, but they were considered top-notch and not just by their users.

Finally, you have to admit that it is somewhat ironic that you are making an impassioned argument against ability grouping, yet have made sure to place your own kids in a school that is de facto ability grouped, by virtue of the SES of its users.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:00pm

No, only Madamarama Ikatarama has the power to use the crystal ball.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:03pm
Again, you need warning labels before your posts...Pepsi on computer screen...lol! My dh is going to wonder why we need a new monitor soon.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:05pm

When you start actually looking at the standards - what the students are supposed to be able to do - you can easily see that it's not demanding. States have made sure they don't raise the bar too high because otherwise their federal funding would be jeopardized.

So when you see a passing level around 70%, that tells you something is wrong; there's no way that suggests high standards are being met across the board. Do we really expect 30% of all students not to learn to ride a bike or to do their own laundry someday? Of course not.

The level of complacency in the U.S. wrt education is staggering, IMO. The Indians and the Chinese will be our employers in another generation or two. We need far more than 6 hours per day, 180 days per year of school, for starters.

Sabina


Oh, lifeis a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea:


And love is a thing that can never go wrong; and I am Marie of Roumania.


Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:21pm

Formal school?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:24pm

I

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:27pm

<<Appearances can be all well and good but any parent leaving thier baby in the care of another must wonder if everything is really ok. But you can't KNOW, you can only trust. I like KNOWING. >>


But you don't and you can't unless you plan on spending 24/7/365 with your children for their entire lives.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:28pm

<>


Then you are homeschooling?



PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:29pm

Then I don't understand why you send your child to school.

PumpkinAngel

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