Working for Lifestyle/Extras
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| Mon, 11-20-2006 - 11:13am |
Hi Ladies :)
This is my first time on this debate board and I have been dying to jump into some of the topics, but I feel as though they are sooooo long (one in particular is over 1000 replies, yikes!) that starting my own specific one might work out better.
Anyhow, a recurring theme here seems to be what Moms should and shouldn't be going to work for. It seems some are of the opinion that is OK for Mom to work if she must to pay her bills but NOT if its to afford a nice car, house, good neighborhood. This is considered keeping up with the Johnses (who are they???) and thats bad.
Well, I want to know what in the heck is wrong with a women working to have nice things? I don't mean working and leaving baby in child care 16 hours a day, everyday...thats pretty extreme.
I enjoyed a certain lifestyle before having a child, should I have downsized that lifestyle once baby came so I didn't have to work? What about me *wanting* to maintain a certain lifestyle for myself, my husband, and my child makes me a (a) workaholic or (b) striving to keep up with the Joneses?
Don't some people (like myself) simply enjoy living in a nice place with nice things and want their children to have the same experience?
So please, anyone who thinks a women is wrong for WOH if she is not doing so to financially survive but does it to maintain a certain lifestyle...whats wrong with this?
Thanks all :)

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So if my kids spend about 35 hours per week in school, does that mean that their school is mostly raising them? 35 hours is pretty standard from 1st grade in American schools, so are all of the kids in the US who attend school being raised by school (or rather by teachers)? Even if they have a SAHM?
35 hours isn't all that far off of 40.
Lol. Thats not summer! Thats early spring or fall!! :-)
Dont get me wrong, Im not a happy camper when my hair is limp from the humidity or Im dressed up in a suit with pantyhose at work (law firms really need to get on board with business casual!) and its 95 degrees.
But its worth it to me to put up with that to be able to go down the shore (to the beach for non-NJ people) or hang out at my parents pool. I think the pool thing might be what has turned me so into a summer person. When I was 8 we moved into a house with a huge inground pool and I spent every summer till I got a job in high school in the pool every day, all day. Also I have an aunt who had a shorehouse when I was a kid and we used to stay with her in the summers and go crabbing and fishing and boating. You cant do all of those things when its 65!!
Like I stated last post. You need to read the posts. I did talk about Au Pairs because I once was one. This is how I know yours would never say a word to you about how much of an influence she feels she is with your children. She should have the character and decency to know her place according to you and your dh. That is part and parcel of being a nanny.
I'm not obliged to such and I like this debate so I'll tell it as I see it from my perspective. Being a nanny or an aupair are not much different. I didn't like merely taking room and board so I went full time as a nanny to a family with three boys. I liked getting paid and having my time off.
I don't think it's necessary to go to work to save for a child's college education. For one thing, I think a family should start out and remain debt free so the income is freed up to put into stocks/mutual funds/other funds or savings for things like college, if necessary. Two, who says a child has to be sent to college? I went, I paid for it and I came out with little to no debt. It's called working through college and it can be and is done on a daily basis. If you want to fund for college that's your privilege but you could have done it without working if you worked smarter instead of harder.
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
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of course not.
Guilt is actually a positive driving force in many capacities. We have to choose to use guilt wisely and in a positive light.
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
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