Working for Lifestyle/Extras
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| Mon, 11-20-2006 - 11:13am |
Hi Ladies :)
This is my first time on this debate board and I have been dying to jump into some of the topics, but I feel as though they are sooooo long (one in particular is over 1000 replies, yikes!) that starting my own specific one might work out better.
Anyhow, a recurring theme here seems to be what Moms should and shouldn't be going to work for. It seems some are of the opinion that is OK for Mom to work if she must to pay her bills but NOT if its to afford a nice car, house, good neighborhood. This is considered keeping up with the Johnses (who are they???) and thats bad.
Well, I want to know what in the heck is wrong with a women working to have nice things? I don't mean working and leaving baby in child care 16 hours a day, everyday...thats pretty extreme.
I enjoyed a certain lifestyle before having a child, should I have downsized that lifestyle once baby came so I didn't have to work? What about me *wanting* to maintain a certain lifestyle for myself, my husband, and my child makes me a (a) workaholic or (b) striving to keep up with the Joneses?
Don't some people (like myself) simply enjoy living in a nice place with nice things and want their children to have the same experience?
So please, anyone who thinks a women is wrong for WOH if she is not doing so to financially survive but does it to maintain a certain lifestyle...whats wrong with this?
Thanks all :)

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I'm not going to quibble over the what the two are or aren't. I worked doing both jobs and they are not different in the job description.
It's not entirely necessary for you to woh but it may be desirable. Why would any parent be saddled with a 21yo and/or their debt after college graduation? That sounds like a no problem. Yanno, the parents don't know when or how to say "no". It also sounds like the parents don't know how to teach financial responsibility to their children. Take your pick! ;)
I'm not 40, but I do look forward to it. University costs are doable by the student no matter where they go. All they need is ambition. Sure, it's easier if mum and daddy pay for a full ride, but it's not necessary. You are flat out wrong.
You have absolutely no idea of my financial situation. And I WOH for reasons other than funding my childrens' college educations"
It appears to be since that's all you seem to be able to shove down our throats. Keep laughing!
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
You statement was "It is one thing to have a baby and be married, and quite another to be single and have a baby." Which to me read to mean that someone who is married when they give birth is somehow better than someone who is not married when they give birth. My question is if they both conceived while single then why is the one that married before the birth better than the person who did not? They both had unwed sex.
"You see no benefit to someone being married when they have a child or not being married?"
I see a benefit when a couple marries and has a child when the time it right, I see a benefit when a couple is in love and would probably marry in the future moving up that marriage if they have an "oops" baby. I see no benefit to a couple marrying just because they happened to make a baby together.
"I can't imagine how hard it would be to be a teenaged single mother."
Do you think it would be any easier to be a teenager in a shotgun wedding because of a pregnancy?
Yep, and when you read what is written in my posts you will see that I had a wonderful career doing my life's work for many years for other children. She knows she can do anything and STILL be a sahm.
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
Personally, I'd prefer those protecting us to be employed in enough numbers that working mega hours was not required. However, having the parents among the ranks reduce hours to actually parent would not reduce hours for the entire ranks.
Given that my brother in law, who is a fireman, has a lot more time to spend with his family than most, I'd say it's not an issue. Yes, he spends 24 hours at the firehouse when there but he is home more days per week all day to be involved with the kids.
I'm not sure what police schedules are but my neighbor, who is an officer in another city, seems to keep pretty regular hours.
Edited 12/2/2006 10:40 pm ET by gr8fulmom1
By 24 x 7, I'm referring to being only a mom. When my job gets to me, I go home. Home doesn't get to me because I'm not there 24 x 7. Anything gets old if you do it enough.
And no, your house won't be cleaner because you're not there, unless your house is self cleaning and cleans itself while you are gone. If you're not there, you're not there to clean it either. It stays as clean as you left it. I find I don't have the time to leave mine as clean as I'd like but that's ok. It's not worth quitting my job to have a cleaner house.
If all the moms you know use preschool, why not get jobs and do something productive with your time while your kids are being socialized?
Edited 12/2/2006 11:01 pm ET by gr8fulmom1
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
"Besides this we have our living prophet, for whom I am grateful, and I hope to follow after him all the days of my life.&
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