Working Mom to 2 Beautiful Kids

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Working Mom to 2 Beautiful Kids
1070
Thu, 07-06-2006 - 3:13pm

In reading the other posts here, I feel the need to give my opinion (my mother-in-law's phrase - opinions are like rear-ends -- everyone has one and some stink worse than others - LOL!).

I'm an accountant. Granted, my job isn't physically demanding, but at times it is mentally challenging. There are days that I go home and I don't want to cook supper - I'd rather get a bucket of chicken or grab the family to go to the Mexican restaurant down the road to eat. I work 40 hours a week.

As for family's suffering because I work, I think it's give-and-take. Because of my income, we can afford things we wouldn't otherwise be able to have. My kids are able to take piano lessons (yes, they want to - it was their idea), one is in the band at school (who knew a clarinet costs $1,300???) and plays softball and basketball, her little brother is playing football (again, I had to fork out $65 up front - there's no telling how much more I'll have to fork out once practices start!). We drive a minivan with an entertainment system, we get to go to the beach for a week each year. My kids are flying to Dallas next week (we live in Alabama) to visit my sister for the next week. Plane tickets are expensive. All of these things we couldn't do without my income. Since both of my kids are school age, the only time I don't see them that I would if I were a SAHM is 1 1/2 hours in the afternoon during the schoolyear and during the day in the summers. I take them to school - I pick them up at 4:30.

The sacrifices we make because I work - my house isn't as clean as I would like for it to be, my house is a zoo every morning, I have a MOUNTAIN of laundry to do on Saturday, I have to wait for vacation days or holidays to repaint bedrooms or rearrange furniture.

My sister and 4 sisters-in-law all have the luxury (yes, LUXURY) of not having to work. I can't call them before 9 am because most times they aren't out of the bed yet. They call me all day long while I'm at work - "whatcha doin'?" Duh, I'm working!! One of them is on the computer on and off all day long - I know cause I'm sitting here in front of mine and I can see when she logs on and off the messenger program. They wonder why I don't have time to hit this sale or that one. Well, after working all day, shlepping the kids to 14 different activities, I really would rather not go shopping.

One other thing I don't think SAHMs realize - we working mothers aren't shirking our household responsibilities. I still have the house sitting there, waiting for me to come home to clean it. Dinner still has to get to the table. Laundry still has to be washed. Kids still have to be attended to.

I think to each his own - I was a SAHM while my 2 were babies - I couldn't imagine another woman receiving those yummy baby kisses or catching those toddler falls. But that was my preference -- as tired as I am each evening, I can't imagine coming home and taking care of a baby!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:51pm

"So then you don't work in an area that is that dangerous?"

I work in an area that's very dangerous.

"I am sure that you are aware of the horrible dangers that I95 in NC have. Your drug dealers and Florida dealers love to meet half way."

And North Carolinians get no cut of the pie, huh? LOL! One of the sure signs of a car stop that will lead to an arrest here are North Carolina plates."

"Intradiction here is unreal."

Intradiction??

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:51pm
No I won't argue that. Still doesn't change the fact that college savings are still just a priority. A big one at that. Thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:52pm

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You have no idea where she and her dh work, either, but you had no problems claiming you know where she'd go or not. Why is it okay if you do it, but not if she does?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:53pm
Yes, I was going to post that. I don't know what "capital police " she was referring to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:54pm

***I work in an area that's very dangerous.***

Just returning the sarcasm.

***And North Carolinians get no cut of the pie, huh? LOL! One of the sure signs of a car stop that will lead to an arrest here are North Carolina plates."***

Why is that?

***Intradiction??***

You don't know what that is? Highway patrol run interdiction here on I95 24/7.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:54pm

Actually - I believe that even early human ancestors had some form of rudementary clothing and shelter to protect them from the elements. (you know, animal skins, caves ect.)

But I agree this is a bit ridiculous. All I was trying to point out was that the way I interpret the definition of necessity - does not allow me to include college savings. But you may interpret it differently. Often definitions are interpreted differently by different people (as is the case here).

But one thing is for SURE - it is a big priority in my world (so we agree there).

Josee

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:54pm
perhaps where you live. however, i am not the only one who has said saving for college is a necessity.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:55pm

You missed the boat on that one. She made the same claim about my husband. It was just a return of the sarcasm. But thanks for your opinion even though you were way off.

***You have no idea where she and her dh work, either, but you had no problems claiming you know where she'd go or not.***

That was a general statement. I doubt she hangs out in the neighborhoods she works in either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:56pm
I was talking about this board.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2006
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 3:56pm

ROFL! Good catch, BTW.

There are two NYs. "The City" and everywhere else (and Albany is included in the "everywhere else"). NYC statistics (not just on crime but on any subject you can imagine) skew everything for the entire state.

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